By Robert Manni 

By: Yolanda Shoshana

During Valentine’s Day season most people focus on Champagne. That’s totally understandable because it’s one sexy wine. I want to encourage you to try something other than sparkling wine. How about adding Cognac into your libation rotation? It’s that time of year, February, also known as the month of love. Though at Cupid’s Pulse we bring the love year-round.

Cognac is produced in a very charming city of the same name in France. French is the language of lovers so think of it as the spirit of “love in a bottle”.

For so long people have thought of Cognac as an older man’s drink, but it couldn’t be further from the truth. The spirit has a vibrant history of being the libation of choice by kings, queens, and aristocrats. Now, most people think of rappers when they see Cognac. It’s true than many famous singers/rappers love Cognac. However, it’s also enjoyed by men and women around the world, especially in Japan and the US.  Besides being known for luxury, it’s rather seductive. It’s easy to find it as an ingredient in cocktails at fancy hotel bars and even dive bars have gotten into serving classy Cognac drinks. People have caught on to how delightful and versatile Cognac can be.

Related Link: Love & Libations: Autumn + Red Wine = Love

Ready to get it in? Here are some celebrity-inspired suggestions:

Branson Cognac

Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson is always up to something. If he isn’t posting leaks for his hit show, Power, he is trolling someone online.  What you may not know about him is that he released a Cognac last year called Branson. If you go with the VSOP. it’s meant to be used in a cocktail. If you really want to turn it up, get the XO. It’s always a smooth move. When you get a whiff of citrus, tobacco, and honey, it starts the game of seduction.

50’s s love life has been bumpy throughout the years. He may not be the person look to for love advice; however, Branson would be the perfect selection to use in a hot drink to have a cozy night with your partner.

Café Amore Cocktail

1 ounce Branson Cognac

1 ounce amaretto

6 ounces coffee

Whipped Cream ( garnish)

Pour Cognac and amaretto into an Irish coffee glass. Fill with hot black coffee. Top with whipped cream.

Related Link: Love & Libations: The Love Of The Negroni

Conjure Cognac

When Conjure first came out it was a little rough around the edges. The spirit by Ludacris has stepped up its game. The tag line is “Conjure the Possibilities”. Sounds fun, but you may want to proceed with caution since some have called Cognac,  “baby-making juice.” Or as Ludacris would put it, makes you  a” lady in the streets, but a freak in the bed”

The aromas in this juice are cocoa, cedar, and hazelnut. Below is the recipe by Conjure for a sweet tea that would be perfect to pair with a romantic home-cooked dinner. It will get your senses going among other things.

Conjure Sweet Tea

4-5 mint sprigs

1 1/2 oz. Conjure

3/4 oz. freshly pressed lemon juice

1 oz. simple syrup

1 oz. iced tea

Fill glass with ingredients. Shake and strain over fresh ice cubes. Garnish with a spring of mint.

Is it possible to spending time with an ex after a breakup?

Hi Carrolton:

Great question about an issue many daters face. Having seen my share of committed relationships, I discovered that the end is not the end until both partners get on the same page. Breaking up is tough, and regardless of the circumstances, people are creatures of habit. That makes cutting the cord with your ex a challenge. And, if the sex was good, it makes it even more challenging. When you meet up with your ex, even as friends, it’s easy to be tempted to return to old habits which are a short term fix rather than a long -term solution.

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: Should I Remain Friends with My Ex Online?

So, I don’t recommend post-breakup hookups. This can mess with your head on many levels. When a couple breaks up, it means at least one partner was dissatisfied and probably wants to date other people. How can you move on when you see your ex, and even under the auspices of a friendly drink, you end up in the sack? It’s not a good idea. Here’s an example.

I was in a committed relationship. Over time, we drifted apart partially due to travel for our jobs. Eventually, we broke up. She moved out and got her own place only a few blocks away. So, we got together a few times for a “friendly” dinner, and each time ended the night rumpling the sheets before she went home. This went on for a few months until I texted to see if she was up for a drink. This time she said no. She told me that the last time we got together she got busted by her new boyfriend (news to me) when she returned home with her blouse on backward. That was the end of that. Happily, the breakup turned out to be a gift. I licked my emotional wounds, moved on, and dated a number of amazing, intelligent, very attractive women until I met my future wife.

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: How Can You Tell Red Flags From Online Dating?

The lesson for me was that when it’s over, it’s over, and that means it’s time to move on. In the rare instance that you both want to get back together, there is no better way to sort that out than spending time apart, without the temptation of post-breakup sex.

I hope this helps,

Your Guy’s Guy

Robert Manni

If you would like relationship expert Robert Manni to answer your online dating/relationship questions, please email gillian@nvmediainc.com 

More about the Guy’s Guy: 

Robert is the host of Guy’s Guy Radio, featured on Blog Talk Radio and available on iTunes, Stitcher, and TuneIn. The weekly podcast features interviews with relationship coaches, entertainers, authors, wellness experts, spiritual teachers, sports personalities, and a weekly “Guys’ Guy’s Guide” exploring current guy-focused topics.

His novel, THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE, praised as the “men’s successor to Sex and the City,” has been developed into two feature-length adapted screenplays, a scripted television series (pilot and treatment), and a series of non-scripted Guy’s Guy show concepts.

Robert has appeared on broadcast television (NBC’s Morning Blend, WPIX11 Morning News) and is a frequent guest across a spectrum of satellite, terrestrial, and web-based radio programs and podcasts, as well as a contributor to Huffington Post, Thought Catalog, Cupid’s Pulse, GalTime, is a featured expert on GoodMenProject and YourTango. He was also named a Top Dating Blogger by DatingAdvice.com.

Robert developed the Guy’s Guy Platform to help men and women better understand each other and bridge the growing communication gap between the sexes. He continually creates a fresh, robust palette of timely Guy’s Guy content focused on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Whether it’s navigating the challenges of dating, relationships, friendship, career or wellness, Robert explores ways to help both men and women be at their best so that everybody wins.

Blog: RobertManni.com

Podcast: Guy’s Guy Radio

Twitter: @RobertManni

Facebook: RobertManniAuthor

Guy’s Guy Brand Video

By Robert Manni

Question from Emma B., “Hi Robert. I took my partner home for the holidays and things didn’t go well. My parents and partner did not get along well and I was stuck in the middle. Do you have any suggestions of how to handle the aftermath and to keep the peace between all the people I care about? Thanks!

Post-holiday tension, how do I keep the peace?

Hi Emma,

This is a great question about situations that often occur, but are rarely acknowledged as potential relationship deal-breakers. And unfortunately, there are no definitive answers when problems arise, because no two families or situations of this nature are alike. Every family has quirks we have to deal with, but for a relationship to flourish, it’s critical that there are positive dynamics between our partners and parents. After all, when in a serious relationship, we’re usually in contact with family on a regular basis.

Related Link: Ask the Guy’s Guy: What Do I Do If I Have Trouble Opening Up To My Significant Other?

I’ve never had an issue with my partner’s parents, but I did have a few relationships end due to underlying tensions between me and members of my partner’s family. In one case, they drank and got high too often, even for my taste. On top of that, when they drank they had a tendency to become verbally abusive. Another time, my partner’s brother pulled me aside at family gathering to threaten me if I did anything wrong to his sister. Unfortunately, at the time my partners became defensive and less than empathetic with me. Over time, both relationships ended. Looking back, I’m glad they did.  

Without knowing the specifics of your situation, if your partner is not connecting with your folks, regardless of the reason why, you’re caught in the middle which puts a strain on you and your relationships with both your partner and parents. You need to find out what happened. It could be bad chemistry, polarizing political views, cultural differences or your parents’ perspective about the relationship. Get your partner’s take and also broach the subject with your parents if they have not already talked about it with you. The issue could be the result of an innocent comment, or it could be something more deep-seated. 

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: If He Isn’t Ready To Date, What Should I Do?

Whatever the case may be, if you value your relationship, get to the bottom of things right away so any negative feelings don’t have time to fester. If you do everything in your power to broker peace and things ultimately don’t work out between your partner and parents, you’ll have a choice to make. At least you’ll know you did your best to find a way for things to work out between them. 

I hope this helps. Good luck.

Your Guy’s Guy

Robert Manni

If you would like relationship expert Robert Manni to answer your online dating/relationship questions, please email gillian@nvmediainc.com 

More about the Guy’s Guy: 

Robert is the host of Guy’s Guy Radio, featured on Blog Talk Radio and available on iTunes, Stitcher, and TuneIn. The weekly podcast features interviews with relationship coaches, entertainers, authors, wellness experts, spiritual teachers, sports personalities, and a weekly “Guys’ Guy’s Guide” exploring current guy-focused topics.

His novel, THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE, praised as the “men’s successor to Sex and the City,” has been developed into two feature-length adapted screenplays, a scripted television series (pilot and treatment), and a series of non-scripted Guy’s Guy show concepts.

Robert has appeared on broadcast television (NBC’s Morning Blend, WPIX11 Morning News) and is a frequent guest across a spectrum of satellite, terrestrial, and web-based radio programs and podcasts, as well as a contributor to Huffington Post, Thought Catalog, Cupid’s Pulse, GalTime, is a featured expert on GoodMenProject and YourTango. He was also named a Top Dating Blogger by DatingAdvice.com.

Robert developed the Guy’s Guy Platform to help men and women better understand each other and bridge the growing communication gap between the sexes. He continually creates a fresh, robust palette of timely Guy’s Guy content focused on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Whether it’s navigating the challenges of dating, relationships, friendship, career or wellness, Robert explores ways to help both men and women be at their best so that everybody wins.

By Robert Manni

Question from Julie S. asks: “I’ve been dating my boyfriend for almost a year, and this is our first holiday season together. After reading an article about the Turkey Drop, I’m curious if you think it’s real and if there are some signs that my boyfriend might do the same to me? Thanks!”

Were you Turkey Dropped this Thanksgiving?

Hi Julie:

Regardless of the season, if your boyfriend is about to drop you, it will be more than obvious. Here are some obvious signs, though. He might seem more distant, he is not paying as much attention to you, and his eyes may be wandering. Maybe he does not respond to your texts as quickly and has become less available during the week due to after-hours “meetings” and drinks with coworkers and his buddies. Or so he says… These are universal signs that he may be moving on, regardless of the time of the year. And, that’s the real issue.

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: How Do I Get Through The Holiday Season Being Single?

If you are in a tenuous or strained relationship, by the time November rolls around, all the holiday pressure and fanfare heading into the season make it a conveniently self-serving time to cut things off. Of course, no one likes being dropped, but in a way, escaping an unfulfilling relationship before the holidays can provide needed time to reset so you get a jumpstart on the new year which is only a month away.

Although it can be uncomfortable answering the same questions on Thanksgiving and other holiday get-togethers about why your guy isn’t with you, if things are not working it’s better to get this out of the way and enjoy the holidays on your terms. After all, during these hectic days, everyone is focused on their own affairs, not your relationship status. Plus, when you are newly single, holiday parties are opportunities to get back in circulation and make new connections while taking your mind off your ex. 

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: If He Isn’t Ready To Date, What Should I Do?

Let’s face it. No one likes getting dumped, especially at this time of year. However, if you’re a glass-half-full person, being “turkey dropped” allows you to enjoy the company of your squad and loved ones without worrying about your now ex-boyfriend’s intentions. After all, who wants to stay in an unsettling relationship simply because it’s the holidays? Sometimes sudden endings are gifts in disguise.

Love yourself and make your happiness top priority, regardless of the time of year. When you’re in the right relationship you won’t be concerned about looking for signs that he’s going to dump you. You’ll be too busy having a great time and feeling good about your relationship.

Hope this helps, Happy Thanksgiving, and drop that turkey if he’s not treating you well!

Your Guy’s Guy

Happy holidays and good luck!

If you would like relationship expert Robert Manni to answer your online dating/relationship questions, please email gillian@nvmediainc.com

More about the Guy’s Guy: 

Robert is the host of Guy’s Guy Radio, featured on Blog Talk Radio and available on iTunes, Stitcher, and TuneIn. The weekly podcast features interviews with relationship coaches, entertainers, authors, wellness experts, spiritual teachers, sports personalities, and a weekly “Guys’ Guy’s Guide” exploring current guy-focused topics.

His novel, THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE, praised as the “men’s successor to Sex and the City,” has been developed into two feature-length adapted screenplays, a scripted television series (pilot and treatment), and a series of non-scripted Guy’s Guy show concepts.

Robert has appeared on broadcast television (NBC’s Morning Blend, WPIX11 Morning News) and is a frequent guest across a spectrum of satellite, terrestrial, and web-based radio programs and podcasts, as well as a contributor to Huffington Post, Thought Catalog, Cupid’s Pulse, GalTime, is a featured expert on GoodMenProject and YourTango. He was also named a Top Dating Blogger by DatingAdvice.com.

Robert developed the Guy’s Guy Platform to help men and women better understand each other and bridge the growing communication gap between the sexes. He continually creates a fresh, robust palette of timely Guy’s Guy content focused on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Whether it’s navigating the challenges of dating, relationships, friendship, career or wellness, Robert explores ways to help both men and women be at their best so that everybody wins.

By: Yolanda Shoshana

‘Tis the season made for entertaining. Whichever holiday you invite people to celebrate with you, a punch is the way to go.  It’s a great way to imbibe with family and loved ones, plus it saves you the hassle of having to continuous drinks during the night. Put out a punch bowl then pop a ladle in it, you will be good to go.

Must-Try Holiday Punches!

Blackened American Whiskey

As we know, celebrities love being in the booze game. Who would have thought that award-winning Master Distiller, Dave Pickerell, and Metallica would collaborate to create a bourbon. Maybe their song, “Whiskey In A Jar” was a big hint. Blackened American Whiskey is a marriage of the finest bourbons, ryes & whiskeys, however, it’s mainly bourbon. The whiskey gets finished in black brandy casks. Does it get any sexier than that?\

This is all to say that the whiskey would be perfect in a punch  The first time I had Blackened was in a cold toddy. It’s the sibling cocktail to the hot toddy. It’s refreshing and is a holiday treat in a glass.   

Related Link: Love & Libations: Autumn + Red Wine = Love

Cold Toddy

Ingredients:

• 1 medium orange
• 5 medium lemons
• 4  cinnamon sticks
• 4 Earl Grey tea bags
• 1 tsp. whole cloves
• 2/3 cup honey
• 2 cups Blackened Whiskey
• 1 tsp. orange or regular bitters
• Orange twists (for serving)

Directions:

Using a vegetable peeler, remove zest from orange and 1 of the lemons in strips, leaving white pith behind; slice fruit in half. Squeeze juice from orange into a small bowl. Squeeze juice from lemon into a measuring glass. Slice remaining lemons in half and squeeze juice into glass to measure 1 cup total; save any remaining lemon halves. Set orange and lemon juice aside.

Place zest in a small saucepan. Beat cinnamon sticks with the side of a chef’s knife to break up a little and add to saucepan along with smashed ginger, tea bags, cloves, and 1 3/4 cups water. Bring to a boil and remove from heat; let sit 5 minutes. Remove tea bags, then stir in honey; let cool completely, about 15- 20 minutes.

Strain tea mixture through a fine-mesh sieve into a pitcher and add whiskey, bitters, and reserved orange juice and lemon juice. Add 2 cups ice and stir until ice is melted and the toddy is very cold.

To serve, pour toddy into glasses filled with ice and garnish with orange twists.

Related Link: Love & Libations: Holiday Cocktailing Like A Celebrity

Próspero Tequila

Another spirit that should make a guest appearance at your holiday table is tequila. You can make a yummy libation that pairs with your autumn dishes. I’ve recently discovered that tequila deserves more credit when it comes to pairing with food.

Did you know that Rita Ora has a female-driven tequila called Próspero Tequila? It’s a relatively new libation and a new area for Ora. The distiller of tequila is one of the few women in the industry. It’s smooth, elegant, and sassy, we couldn’t expect anything less from Ora.

What should you make with this tequila? The Texas Punch is a good way to go since it’s the perfect addition to any gathering. It’s a drink that your friends and family will love. It’s also a drink that you can make for you and your boo to keep in the fridge for after a hard day at work.

Texas Christmas Punch 

Ingredients:

• 1 cup sugar
• 1 cup water
• 4 cups pomegranate juice
• 3 cups  Próspero Tequila
• 1 cup lime juice
• 2 cups cranberry juice
• 1 750-ml bottle sparkling wine (recommend Crémant or Cava)
• fresh cranberries to garnish

Directions:

In saucepan combine the sugar and water and bring to a boil, dissolving the sugar. Remove from heat and cool completely. This will create what is known as simple syrup.

In a large punch bowl stir together the simple syrup, pomegranate juice, tequila, lime juice, and cranberry juice. Chill for 2 hours. Stir in the sparkling wine and serve for a very good time.

For more Love & Libations date night ideas and celebrity couple predictions from Yolanda Shoshana, click here.

Read more on Cupid’s.

By Robert Manni

Question from Dani P: “So I’ve only been on a few dates with two separate girls. They are both cool and fun to hang out with. I told one girl that I was seeing someone else (we’ve only been on a couple of dates) and she said I have to choose. I don’t know if I should choose between them. If I don’t I won’t get to see what things could have become though.  I came out of a long relationship a year ago and don’t think I’m ready to be serious, but I really like this girl. What should I do?”

What are you really looking for in dating two or more people?

Hi Dani, 

It seems like you want to have your cake and eat it too, and fundamentally, there’s nothing wrong with that. After all, life is about finding joy and living your passion. So dating, which usually means seeing more than one person, is fine. However, life is determined by the choices we make, and it seems like it’s time to make some choices about what you want and who you want to spend your time with.

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: What Do I Do If I Have Trouble Opening Up To My Significant Other

You are single and free and that’s all good, but you need to decide what you want out of dating. From my own experience, I’ve met too many people who did not know what they wanted out of dating, and to a person, these singles always ran into problems just like yours. For every single person who is unsure what they want there is another who knows precisely who and want they want. In your case, it sounds like the woman who does not want you dating others either wants you all to herself because she really digs you, or she is pulling a power play. You’ll have to do some work to find out which is true.

I suggest you take a step back and ask yourself what you want now that you’re single again. It sounds like you want to play the field for a while. If that’s true, then play the field and don’t allow anyone to control what you do, especially when you’re doing what say you want to do. If it feels too early to get serious with this person, tell her you dig her, but that you just got back into the single life and would like to take things slowly for now. If she does not accept that, this may be a sign of her future behavior and your freedom. Take note of how she reacts and her response. 

On the other hand, you state that you like her and would like to see her again. Cool. Then tell her you like her and would like to see her again, but make sure she also knows that you are not ready to settle into a committed relationship at this time. If she’s understanding and she really digs you, she will respect your feelings and behave accordingly.

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: If He Isn’t Ready To Date, What Should I Do?

The bottom line is you need to decide for yourself what you want out of dating right now and then be honest and clear about how you feel with potential partners if the subject surfaces. After all, you are the priority, and if you are not sure of what you want or how you feel, it could send out indecisive energy that can lead to similar situations.

The good news is that you are happily single and free, you’re dating, and people want to date you. You’re in a better situation than many of your contemporaries and all you need to do is follow your heart, decide what works for you, and be crystal clear with your potential partners about where you stand if the subject comes up.

Hope this helps,

Guy’s Guy

By Robert Manni

Question from Amy K. San Jose, CA: “I’ve been wondering lately if my boyfriend really loves me. We haven’t been together that long, but how do I know things are serious? How do I know he REALLY likes me?  Thanks, Robert!”

Is your relationship serious?

Hi Amy:

With all the activity taking place in our lives, occasionally we slip into the dreaded “self-doubt” zone, whether it is about love, work, or who we are and our value as a human beings. Before tackling your specific question about love, always remind yourself that you’re a divine being deserving of love.

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: What Do I Do If I Have Trouble Opening Up To My Significant Other

Concerning your sense of doubt about your boyfriend’s feelings, start by asking yourself why you feel this way. Is your intuition telling you he does not share the same feelings for you as you have for him? Or, is he not as emotionally available as you’d like and you simply want him to be more open about his feelings. If that’s the case, ask yourself why he’s not more open about expressing himself. Whatever the case, it sounds like you need reassurances concerning his feelings.

My advice? Ask him straight up how he feels about the relationship. Pay attention to the signals he provides in his response, both verbal and non-verbal. For example, if he’s unsure about his feelings, he will probably act unsure when responding. You can also ask if he loves you, assuming that you have expressed this previously and simply need reassurance. If you have not had the “are we in love” conversation, that’s a different story, but there is no reason why you should hold back on having this conversation. When couples are in the right relationship, it’s easy talking about anything with their partner. Again, when someone is uncomfortable expressing their feelings, it’s usually because they’re unsure about how they feel.

Related Link: Ask The Guy’s Guy: Should I Follow My Boyfriend To Where His Job Is?

As a guy, I can tell you that when a man is happy in a relationship, he doesn’t say much about it. He simply enjoys being with his partner and it usually shows. When dudes have an issue on their mind, they usually bring it up to find out how their partner feels. Unfortunately, many guys (and women) who are unsure about their feelings often stay in relationships. It’s not a good thing, but it often happens, so it’s good to check in on how he is feeling on a regular basis.

The bottom line is if you want a sense of your partner’s feelings, have the conversation, but do it in a casual way. When people, and guys in particular, feel cornered, they get defensive. That said, it’s your right to know how he feels, and regardless of the response, it’s always better to get to the truth. After all, the truth, for better or worse, will set you free.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

Guy’s Guy

Robert Manni

If you would like relationship expert Robert Manni to answer your online dating/relationship questions, please email gillian@nvmediainc.com

More about the Guy’s Guy: 

Robert is the host of Guy’s Guy Radio, featured on Blog Talk Radio and available on iTunes, Stitcher, and TuneIn. The weekly podcast features interviews with relationship coaches, entertainers, authors, wellness experts, spiritual teachers, sports personalities, and a weekly “Guys’ Guy’s Guide” exploring current guy-focused topics.

His novel, THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE, praised as the “men’s successor to Sex and the City,” has been developed into two feature-length adapted screenplays, a scripted television series (pilot and treatment), and a series of non-scripted Guy’s Guy show concepts.

Robert has appeared on broadcast television (NBC’s Morning Blend, WPIX11 Morning News) and is a frequent guest across a spectrum of satellite, terrestrial, and web-based radio programs and podcasts, as well as a contributor to Huffington Post, Thought Catalog, Cupid’s Pulse, GalTime, is a featured expert on GoodMenProject and YourTango. He was also named a Top Dating Blogger by DatingAdvice.com.

Robert developed the Guy’s Guy Platform to help men and women better understand each other and bridge the growing communication gap between the sexes. He continually creates a fresh, robust palette of timely Guy’s Guy content focused on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Whether it’s navigating the challenges of dating, relationships, friendship, career or wellness, Robert explores ways to help both men and women be at their best so that everybody wins.

Read more at Cupid’s.

By Yolanda Shoshana

Pumpkin spice lattes are great,  but wait, it’s time to get wines for autumn. ‘Tis the season for snuggling, cuddling, and binge-watching your favorite shows with a libation to sip and savor. What this means is that it’s time to stock up on wine. Have a good supply so that you are ready for crisp cold nights and snowstorms. Plus, you never know when Netflix is going to drop a new surprise show on a Friday night.

Celebrate Fall With These Autumn Worthy Wines

Continue reading →

By Robert Manni

Question from Sarah Q. Detroit, MI: “I’ve been single for a while and I don’t know where to meet guys or how to put myself out there without going to a bar and waiting for someone to talk to me! How can I meet guys?”

Meeting guys when you just don’t know where to start!

Continue reading →

By Tori Autumn

At some point, many people have to say, “We need to talk,” to their partner, a phrase that could affect the relationship moving forward. Some examples of sensitive topics include moving in, talking about marriage, having children, being committed, financial responsibilities, arguments with family members, unresolved conflict, or the decision to separate.

How to make that tough talk with your partner easier!

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By Robert Manni

Question from Claudia F., Manchester, NH: “My partner and I have been together for five years. We’ve fallen into a routine and I don’t know how to liven up love life – inside and outside the bedroom. Any suggestions?”

Bring life back to your relationship — in and outside the bedroom!

Continue reading →