Dating & Relationship Tag Archive: Relationship Advice
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By Shannon Seibert
Winter is coming, and with the exit of warm weather, it’s time for an update to your wardrobe. So this weekend, head into town with your sweetheart for some snuggly sweaters and adorable boots, and plan your next date idea to showcase your new fashions.
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By Emily Meyer
Famous couple Ashley Hebert and J.P. Rosenbaum’s celebrity love story cannot get any more perfect. Since the birth of their first celebrity baby Fordham Rhys, the pair has stayed busy balancing their new responsibilities of parenthood together. In an exclusive celebrity interview with People.com, the former Bachelorette exclaims, “The first two weeks have been great!” The reality TV star also shares how parenthood has actually brought her and her husband closer together: “Throughout our relationship, our bond always seems to grow stronger with each milestone we reach. It’s still very early in our parenting careers, but it’s easy to see that it’ll take a lot of teamwork, support for one another, and patience when raising this child. You really need to be on the same page all the time.” It sure looks like this famous couple are on the path for a lifelong marriage and happy celebrity family.
…Want to know how to stay connected to your partner after having a baby? Click here for more!
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By Judith Orloff, MD
Adapted from the new book, “The Ecstasy of Surrender”
Many of us are drawn to emotional vampires. From bullies, to clingy lovers, to complainers, emotional vampires wear many different disguises. Intentionally or not, these romantic partners can make us feel depressed, overwhelmed, defensive, wiped out, and angry.
It’s important to figure out why you choose to date people who deplete your energy. Then, you need to learn self-defense strategies to keep them at bay. If you don’t, you could become a victim of the emotional vampire and develop unhealthy behaviors and symptoms, such as overeating, isolating, mood swings, or fatigue.
Below are four common types of emotional vampires you may unwittingly get involved with, adapted from the book The Ecstasy of Surrender, along with some “silver bullet” tips for fending them off.
Type #1: The Passive-Aggressive Person. This type of vampire expresses anger with a smile or exaggerated concern but always maintains their cool. They are experts at sugar-coating hostility.
Self-defense Tips: Let go of self-doubt and trust your gut reactions. Tell yourself that you deserve to be treated more lovingly. Address their behavior. In a calm, firm tone you might say, “I would greatly appreciate it if you can be on time when we go out to dinner.” If nothing changes, keep setting limits with this person and scale back on the time you spend with them.
Type #2: The Narcissist. For this vampire, everything is about them. They are ego-centric, self-important, and starved for admiration and attention. They may be charming and intelligent until their guru status is threatened.
Self-defense Tips: Enjoy their good qualities, but have realistic expectations. Their motto is “me-first,” so getting angry or stating your needs won’t have any effect on them. Beware of this type, because narcissists lack empathy and are incapable of unconditional love. You may be able to get their cooperation by appealing to their self-interest and showing them how your request will benefit them.
Type #3: The Anger Addict. This vampire deals with conflict by accusing, attacking, humiliating, or criticizing. Some anger addicts withhold things, or resort to using the silent treatment to punish you.
Self-defense Tips: Don’t let their anger wear down your self-esteem. Pause when agitated. Take a few slow breaths to relax, and do not respond until you are in a centered place. Try to stay neutral and balanced, and disarm the person by agreeing with them or acknowledging their position. Then state your case. It’s also useful to empathize with anger addicts. Ask yourself what pain or inadequacy makes them so angry.
Type #4: The Guilt Tripper. These types are world-class blamers, martyrs, and drama queens. They know how to make you feel bad about something by pressing your insecurity buttons.
Self-defense Tips: Let go of the notion that you have to be perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. If you feel really guilty, find a private place and let yourself cry. You can also reply with a positive statement such as, “I can see your point of view. But when you say ___, my feelings are hurt. I’d be grateful if you didn’t keep repeating it.”
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Judith Orloff MD is a UCLA psychiatrist and author of “The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your Life”. A New York Times bestselling author, Dr. Orloff teaches workshops nationwide, has given a TED talk on this book, and has appeared on The Dr. Oz Show, Today, PBS, CNN, NPR, and many others. Learn more at www.drjudithorloff.com.
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Serious relationships, a status most singletons strive for, present their own set of complicated issues that naturally arise when two people are on the precipice of sharing the rest of their lives together. And then, life throws a crossroads into your partnership’s trajectory: the dreaded move.
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By Cynthia MacGregor for Hope After Divorce
Celebrity moms Tori Spelling and Kendra Wilkinson are both contemplating divorce due to their unfaithful husbands Dean McDermott and Hank Baskett. They have a lot to consider and process before making the life-changing decision to divorce. Not only will it change their own lives, but it will change their children’s lives. They say divorce changes who children are — and that’s a very serious reality we parents must not take lightly. A second chance is certainly worth the effort when kids are concerned, as long as there is no abuse happening (physical, emotional, or mental) in the home.
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By Shannon Seibert
Life is a cycle of ups and downs filled with both happiness and discontent. With this thought in mind, author Christine Hassler used her unmet expectations as a catalyst for profound transformation. In Expectation Hangover: Overcoming Disappointment in Work, Love, and Life, she writes about leveraging frustrations at any age. CupidsPulse.com had the pleasure of speaking with Hassler about her own expectation hangovers and her book, which was released on October 14th.
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By Amanda Boyer
On Monday, Oct. 20, Blake Lively showed off her celebrity baby bump on the red carpet at the 2014 Angel Ball while standing next to husband, Ryan Reynolds. This is the first event that the Hollywood couple has been to since their celebrity pregnancy was announced earlier this month. According to UsMagazine.com, the lovebirds couldn’t keep their eyes off of each other as they posed for pictures before going into the event.
0 Related Link: The One Thing Men Want from Women
Next time, armed with this advice, you’ll be ready to talk to the hottest man in the room!
For more information about Single in Stilettos shows, click here.
For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.
Any other tips for approaching a handsome guy? Tell us in the comments below!
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By Melanie Mar
These days, looking for love is more accessible than ever. To fit it into life’s busy schedules, there are a vast number of websites and events available to attend, but often, one can start to see dating as a daunting task. To assist you in finding the joy of dating, I’ve listed some tips below on how to enjoy the process. It’s time to date smarter!
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By Emily Meyer
Do we still hear wedding bells for Marcus Grodd and Lacy Faddoul? Although the Bachelor in Paradise couple is pretty low-key, from the looks of their social media accounts, the hot duo is still very much in love. Even though neither of them has made the big move across the country yet (to either Los Angeles or Dallas), it’s obvious they have been traveling back and forth to be with each other. According to Inquisitr.com, Faddoul was in Texas about a week ago with Grodd when she tweeted that the two of them were at the state fair. The couple has previously said they are planning to wed next year, but it looks like fans will just have to stay tuned for more details.
What are three ways to make a long-distance relationship work?
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By Emily Meyer
One of the most important aspects of any girl’s dream wedding is, of course, her gown. Five months into her engagement to Josh Murray, former Bachelorette Andi Dorfman is in the early stages of wedding planning. According to Wetpaint.com, the Atlanta natives are currently in New York City for Couture Bridal Fashion Week. Not only will the couple sit front row at the Mark Zunino for Kleinfeld’s 2015 collection show, they’ll also attend multiple events with the Kleinfeld team. As evident on Dorfman’s Instagram account, they’ve been spending time with Bachelorette couple Desiree Hartsock and Chris Siegfried. We can’t wait to see what wedding dress the stylish reality star picks!
What are three ways to stay calm during wedding planning?
0 Related Link: Do You Push for Commitment Too Soon?
Listen up for more great dating tips!
For more information about Single in Stilettos shows, click here.
For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.
Cupid wants to know: How do you keep an open mind after a not-so-great first date?
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Coming from a family of circus animal entertainers, Brandon McMillan was introduced to the world of animal training at a young age. Beginning with wild animals like tigers and moving on to household canines, he has a long-running love for adrenaline and has mastered the art of command and diligence. On his CBS series Lucky Dog, the animal lover shows off his training skills: Beginning by adopting lonely dogs from shelters, he brings them back to Lucky Dog Ranch to be trained. He then finds homes (often with owners for whom the dog can provide service) for the lucky dogs. In our exclusive celebrity interview, the television star opened up about season two of his hit show and his best dating advice to consider before bringing a furry friend home.
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Tony Dovolani has been a professional dancer on ABC’s hit show Dancing with the Stars since season 2, and he finally won the coveted mirror ball trophy when he was paired with Melissa Rycroft during season 15. This year, he was partnered with fashion designer Betsey Johnson, and they were a fan favorite to say the least. Beginning the season with the notorious boa mishap, the pair climbed the rankings and became an exquisitely entertaining team for audiences to watch. Sadly, Dovolani and Johnson were eliminated during week four. Still, the pro is in high spirits as he gushes about his strong relationship with Johnson and his beautiful family in our exclusive celebrity interview.
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By Shannon Seibert
Cities are a haven for magical sites that capture the essence of romance. The crowds of interesting people, the hustle and bustle of traffic, and even the historical landmarks around you add to your experience. This fall weekend, embark on an adventure with your love and take in all that your hometown (or the nearest big city) has to offer with this exciting date idea!
0 Style and beauty expert Bobbie Thomas knows a thing or two about fall fashion. First, that there’s no need to feel like you have to redo your entire wardrobe for the season. “There’s something for everyone,” Thomas explains in our celebrity interview. “I really like that seasonless style is around, where you can take a spring or summer item — like a bright color or floral pattern — and winterize it.” Of course, the best tip is always confidence. “You need to walk into a situation with…a mission to actually like what you see in the mirror instead of already assuming you’re not going to like that,” she shares.
Related Link: Brad Goreski Predicts Oscars Fashion
This time of year, the one must-have for every girl’s closet is boots. “Riding boots happen to be my personal favorite because they just look so polished. You could be in leggings and a sweater, and they give you just enough heel, but they’re still so comfortable,” she says.
Thomas shares love advice too and encourages practicality for your date night looks. “If you’re looking to have a good time with someone, don’t be uncomfortable!” she reveals. “Make sure you can move around and wiggle in your clothes. You really want to wear something that you’ll be so comfortable in that you’ll be able to be yourself on that date.”
Related Link: Blake Lively’s High-Fashion Style
Just like you want to find a loyal man, the TODAY Show style editor also encourages you to look for a loyal retailer. She’s teamed up with Kohl’s for their Yes2You rewards program. “In order to really expand your wardrobe, you want to shop smart,” she says. “That’s why I think it’s a really great idea to have a retail relationship as well as a real life one!”
You can keep up with Bobbie on Twitter @BobbieThomas. Check Kohl’s for the best fall fashion finds!
For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.
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By Emily Meyer
Well, it seems like this Bachelor in Paradise couple is already on the path to a lifetime of happiness! For Michelle Money’s 34th birthday, boyfriend Cody Sattler gave her the perfect birthday surprise: According to Wetpaint.com, the personal trainer treated his girl to a day at the spa. When Money took to Instagram to thank her friends and family for a great birthday, she wrote, “So many thank you’s for the amazing bday weekend!! Such a special night with great friends and family! All I wanted for my bday was for @cody_sattler to be living in #SLC and sure enough—he does!! Can’t help but feel so overwhelmed with love for the true friends of mine who have stuck with me thru thick and thin!” Money sure seems to have a lot to celebrate these days — and we couldn’t be happier for her!
What are three ways to surprise your partner on their birthday?
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Question from Amelia S.: This guy who my friend has been hanging out with a lot will randomly message me on Facebook whenever I’m online. It’s always harmless stuff like, “What are you up to?” but it still catches me off guard. Should I tell her, and if so, what’s the best way to bring up the subject?
Suzanne K. Oshima, Matchmaker: You know that saying “you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place?” Well, guess what? You’re in a no-win situation! From what you said, it sounds like your friend just likes him and isn’t dating him yet, so “technically,” she can’t get upset that he’s contacting you. Now, I say “technically” because we both know that, if you tell her, she will be upset and hurt.
Now, while you may think that his messages to you are completely harmless, men don’t do things without some sort of intention. Without knowing the entire situation, I’m going to guess that he’s not just looking for a friend and that those harmless messages are going to lead to something more.
So here’s my advice to you: If you truly value your friendship with your friend and have no interest whatsoever in this guy, then I suggest you ignore his “harmless messages”…because it’s just going to lead to a no-win situation for everyone involved.
Related Link: Should I Delete or Unfriend My Exes on Social Networks?
Paige Wyatt, Reality Star: Absolutely tell your friend that this guy has been messaging you. If it truly is harmless, he won’t be embarrassed or upset if she brings it up. If he does have an ulterior motive, then you warned your friend, and it’s now her move. It’s much better to be honest with your friends about situations like this one. If you didn’t tell her and she found out, she may get upset with you. If it really is nothing, then what’s the harm in letting her know?
Related Link: Can You Tell By Someone’s Social Network If They’re The Relationship Type?
Robert Manni, Guy’s Guy: Some say where there’s smoke, there’s fire. In this case, it’s hard not to miss the smoke — but let’s not rush to judgement. When a guy is really interested in a woman, his focus is on her, and he curtails his flirting. Maybe this guy just wants to establish good relationships with his leading lady’s BFFs. Still, I’m not sure if this is the best way to do it. He must know that girlfriends talk. And when friends talk about the curious actions of a guy, his behavior and character go under the microscope. At this point, I’m not sure that’s in his best interests.
As for you, for now, I suggest you either ignore his Facebook messages or keep the exchanges polite. Over time, his true intentions will surface. When they do, you can determine if it’s necessary to let your friend know about his correspondence.
To find out more about our three dating and technology gurus, click here.
If you have any questions you would like answered by our experts, please submit them on our Contact Page.
How would you handle the situation described above? Tell us in the comments below!
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By Emily Meyer
We know reality television isn’t scripted, but that doesn’t mean it’s 100 percent real, right? That’s what Bachelor in Paradise star AshLee Frazier says. In her recent blog post, the reality star talked about going from being “America’s girl” to being portrayed as a villain. The Texas native admits to have stirred the pot but believes the backlash she has received as only made her stronger. She wrote, “If I can be ok after the most hateful words were carelessly thrown my way by people who know nothing about my life, then you can get through the tough times and know that there is an end.”
How do you bounce back after a bad breakup?
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By Michele Sfakianos, RN, BSN for Hope After Divorce
The expenses for caring for children continue to rise, and that doesn’t make it any easier for divorced parents. Each parent attempts to keep their own household going, and at the same time, they often try to share expenses for their children. This may be court ordered or due to a mutual agreement between the parents.
Whether the divorcing couple is a celebrity couple in the public eye or a private couple, the children’s needs and welfare should be the number one priority. You must accept and embrace the reality that your children’s expenses to live will not change. They are our greatest responsibility and deserve the best care and protection we can give them, whether married or divorced. Some divorced celebrity couples, like Demi Moore and Bruce Willis and Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe, seem to put their children’s best interest ahead of their own as they co-parent together.
Related Link: Ryan Phillippe Says He’s ‘ Proud’ of How He and Reese Co-Parent
Routine check-ups at both the doctor’s office and the dentist are essential for your children. One of the parents should have both medical and dental coverage on the children, as the cost of this type of preventative care out of pocket is very high. If one of your children have an emergency for either place, it can be a bill you have to pay for a very long time.
Childcare is another expense that can add up when a divorce takes place. Perhaps one of the parents was the caregiver, and now both are in the workforce. The parents should decide on a childcare provider together. It may be a licensed facility, a nanny, or even a family member. The cost of childcare should be second to the quality of care that your children are receiving.
Inevitably, there will be additional expenses for your children. Who is going to pay for school clothing and supplies? Many parents who pay child support assume that they pay enough for such items with that monthly check. Yet it may be just enough to help the family with food and shelter. You don’t want your children to go without due to lack of money.
Many children love to be involved in extracurricular activities as well. It can be sports, dance, or clubs. There will be expenses involved, including special clothing and shoes needed and even enrollment fees. Parents need to be willing to share these expenses so that their children can take part in such events.
Related Link: Helping Your Child Through Divorce
Summer is also a time when there are more expenses for children. They may want to go to swimming lessons, camping, or even to a summer camp. All of these things cost money, and someone has to pay it! Some feel the parent who makes more money should cover the cost. This is up to the parents though, as many want to do everything 50/50. Problems could arise when one parent can’t afford their share.
As you can see, there are plenty of additional expenses to consider for your children when you are divorced. Make sure you are willing to discuss these expenses with the other parent. You always want to do what’s in the best interest of your children. Bottom line: Get as much in writing as you can when it comes to who will cover expenses. This way, everyone involved knows what to plan for.
For more information about Hope After Divorce, click here.
Michele Sfakianos, RN, BSN, is a Registered Nurse, Life Skills Expert, Speaker and Award Winning Author. She is the owner of Open Pages Publishing, which includes her series of “The 4-1-1” books on Life Skills, Step Parenting, and Surviving Teenhood. Michele is a contributing expert for HopeAfterDivorce.org, DivorceSupportCenter.com, FamilyShare.com, and CupidsPulse.com.
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By Shannon Seibert
It’s important to be prepared for the best and worst of what marriage has to offer. In her new memoir Messy Beautiful Love: Hope and Redemption for Real-Life Marriages, Darlene Schacht gets in depth about the trials that couples face in their marriage, including issues like financial struggles, sickness, aging parents, and a chronically unhappy husband. This book explores the idea that, no matter how strong the bond, the mess has to be dealt with at one point or another to keep the marriage alive. Messy Beautiful Love is an invitation to readers to open their hearts to the possibility of a strong and healthy marriage with proper communication and team work.
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By Amanda Boyer
Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner were spotted at a farmers’ market on Sunday, Oct. 5, in L.A.’s Pacific Palisades neighborhood and were showing some rare affection in public. According to USMagazine.com, the duo spent a day away from their kids and picked up fresh food for their family. When they got to their car, Affleck leaned forward to plant a kiss on his wife’s cheek.
How do you show you care in public?
0 On this week’s Single in Stilettos show, founder Suzanne Oshima talks to dating coach Mr. Locario about how to know if a guy is interested in you. Here are the top five signs to look out for: He can’t stop staring at you; he calls or contacts you in some way; he wants to show you off to his family and friends; he tries to make you laugh; and he acts nervous around you. Don’t miss the rest of Mr. Locario’s advice in the video above!
Related Link: Mr. Locario on Why He Didn’t Call You Back
For more information about Single in Stilettos shows, click here.
For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.
How do you know if a guy is interested in you? Share with us in the comments below!
