By David Wygant
Let me explain how I personally handle a break-up and why it’s probably one of the most amazing ways to heal. When I experience a break-up with somebody, I want to process through it very quickly. Why? Because to me, life is always about moving on.
When I was 19 years old, my mother and I had a long talk. At that time in my life, Kris, my high school girlfriend, had just broken up with me for the third time, and I was extremely upset. I was full of heartache. I was sobbing. I couldn’t believe that this was the third time we had broken up.
Dating Advice from a Relationship Expert
My mother looked at me and gave me some of the best dating advice I’ve ever received. She was actually about to divorce my father, although I didn’t find out about that until the next day.
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She said, “David, this will not be the last woman who loves you. As a matter of fact, there will be many women who love you. You see, you’ve learned some amazing things. You’ve grown from this relationship, and because of it, you became a better person. Thanks to all the wonderful experiences you had with Kris, you’re going to meet somebody who loves you more.”
Those words of wisdom really sunk in, and because of them, I’ve always been able to process past relationships very quickly. Whether I ended it or they did, I’ve always known that there’s going to be somebody out there who’s going to love me so much more.
Recently, I was with somebody, and I got love bombed. I spent three months with her. It was literally a summer romance; it lasted from Memorial Day to Labor Day. She told me that she loved me 15 times a day. Then, we had a conflict, and after that, we never spoke ever again. She denied all of her feelings and everything that went on between the two of us.
I was heartbroken, but I was also relieved. I truly believe that, when conflict comes up, you get to see someone for who they truly are — not the well-behaved person that they’ve been pretending to be.
So how did I process through the break-up and end up so much stronger, more powerful, and more open to love than ever before? I talked to my friends. I literally spent two days doing nothing but healing. I went to my coach and therapist a few times. I figured out what I learned from my ex. I embraced how much I grew from the experience. I literally thanked the universe for presenting her to me so that I learned another valuable lesson in love.
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After 72 hours, I realized that I am a far better man because of my relationship with her. I was able to be loving and open again, something I hadn’t really done for a couple of years. And my experience with her reminded me of the beautiful relationship advice that my mother gave me years ago. There’s somebody out there who’s going to love me even more, and I feel so satisfied knowing that. That’s why I’ve always been able to go through a break-up quickly and come out stronger, more open, and more willing to love.
For more dating advice from relationship expert David Wygant, click here.
