By Robert Manni
Question from Samantha W: I’m new to the digital dating world and my friends keep recommending Tinder, but this app has the reputation for hook-ups. How can I find something more serious and filter out the booty calls?
Serious Online Dating for Beginners
Hi Samantha,
Congratulations on entering the digital dating world. When it comes to dating, technology can be a blessing or a curse. It’s up to you and how you play the online dating game. One key to success is always being yourself, the same person you are online as offline. That means maintaining your values and criteria for potential online dates just as you would when meeting someone in person. If you’re not into booty calls, don’t waste your energy on apps that have a reputation for hook ups.
Related Link: Ask the Guys’ Guy: How to Win a First Date After Meeting Online
There is a wide variety of dating websites and apps to choose from. Many are specific about the type of clientele they seek and who they cater to. When getting your feet wet in online dating, it’s easy to dive into the deep end of the pool and find yourself treading water due to the amount of offers you’ll receive. On most sites and apps, new people get lots of attention and it can be quite overwhelming if you are a smart and attractive woman.
Related Link: Relationship Advice: Four Types of Men You’ll Meet Online
Before signing up or downloading an app, do your own research and talk to your friends, both female and male. When you have a clear sense of what the apps and sites are all about, I suggest choosing between one and three apps or websites to sample on a trial basis. That way you’ll see the differences in what each service has to offer without spreading yourself so thin that you’re constantly juggling dates instead of qualifying potential partners and making a real connection. I also strongly recommend looking inside and determining what experience you want to get out of the online dating game before signing up. If your goal is simply dating, you’re in luck. If you want to go deeper, you’ll need to set your personal parameters for qualifying the type of guy you’re looking for and then stick to your plan.
The good way of managing the online dating process is by starting slow and keeping things simple until your get your bearings and a feel for how the online dating game is played. Remember, never lower your standards to match a service or an app that does not represent the real you.
I hope this helps. Good luck!
Robert Manni
If you would like relationship expert Robert Manni to answer your online dating/relationship questions, please email lori@cupidspulse.com.
More about the Guy’s Guy:
Robert is the host of Guy’s Guy Radio, featured on Blog Talk Radio and available on iTunes, Stitcher, and TuneIn. The weekly podcast features interviews with relationship coaches, entertainers, authors, wellness experts, spiritual teachers, sports personalities, and a weekly “Guys’ Guy’s Guide” exploring current guy-focused topics.
His novel, THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE, praised as the “Men’s successor to Sex and the City,” has been developed into two feature-length adapted screenplays, a scripted television series (pilot and treatment), and a series of non-scripted Guy’s Guy show concepts.
Robert has appeared on broadcast television (NBC’s Morning Blend, WPIX11 Morning News) and is a frequent guest across a spectrum of satellite, terrestrial, and web-based radio programs and podcasts, as well as a contributor to Huffington Post, Thought Catalog, Cupid’s Pulse, GalTime, is a featured expert on GoodMenProject and YourTango. He was also named a Top Dating Blogger by DatingAdvice.com.
Robert developed the Guy’s Guy Platform to help men and women better understand each other and bridge the growing communication gap between the sexes. He continually creates a fresh, robust palette of timely Guy’s Guy content focused on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Whether it’s navigating the challenges of dating, relationships, friendship, career or wellness, Robert explores ways to help both men and women be at their best so that everybody wins.
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