Cupid's Pulse Article: Parenting Tips: Being an Adoptive ParentCupid's Pulse Article: Parenting Tips: Being an Adoptive Parent

By Melissa Lee

The journey that comes along with parenting is never a walk in the park, but becoming or being an adoptive parent is a completely different experience. Although it is heart-warming, kind, and a beautiful adventure, there can also be a lot of heartache, stress, and emotional trauma. Similarly to having your own biological child, there is no amount of advice that can fully prepare you for the real thing. However, if you’re still in the market for some suggestions, Cupid has your back.

Check out these parenting tips if you’re on the road to becoming an adoptive parent!

1. Decide between an open or closed adoption: Assuming you’ve done the majority of your research and have made the final decision to become an adoptive parent, choosing between an open or closed adoption is a another huge aspect. Closed adoptions consist of a rather confidential relationship between your child and their birth parents, where they will have little to no contact. On the other hand, with open adoptions, the birth parent(s) are able to communicate with you or your adopted child, but the extent of contact is completely up to you.

2. Understand the finances: The money aspect of adoption is something that typically isn’t talked about. Though it depends on the type of adoption you choose (domestic, international, private or independent), adopting a child can cost anywhere between $4,000 to $30,000. Given these hefty costs, there are ways to lessen the amount of money to pay, like low-interest loans offered by the National Adoption Foundation.

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3. Use a lawyer: Adoption experts suggest hiring a lawyer, especially one that specializes in adoptions, when the process officially begins. Although this can sound scary and more legal than expect, a lawyer will ensure that there are no mistakes or loopholes when it comes down to being the adopted child’s guardian. At the end of the day, you would rather be safe than sorry.

4. There can be a lot of emotional and physical damage: Experts advise to keep your expectations low regarding the adopted child. This is not meant to be crude, but rather because the child’s former environment could have potentially left them in a rough state. A high percentage of adopted children were exposed to drugs or alcohol in the womb, which can have longterm effects, both physical or emotional.

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5. Be open: Although the stigma surrounding adoption has mainly been lifted, it’s highly important to be open about the topic, especially with your child. Focus on celebrating your family rather than acting like it’s some sort of taboo subject, and be prepared to talk about the process as well.

What are some of your tips for adoptive parents? Leave your thoughts below.