Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice: True Love or Rebound?Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice: True Love or Rebound?

By Amy Osmond Cook for Divorce Support Center

It’s a familiar scene; we watch a friend wallow in a doomed relationship for a while only to hear him or her declare their true love was found in a brand new relationship. For example, as fans watched multi-platinum recording artist Taylor Swift switch from her celebrity relationship with Calvin Harris to cozying on the beach with new squeeze Tom Hiddleston, it makes one wonder if this truly was perfect timing for a new love to grow, or simply a rebound relationship? Sometimes it’s hard to know for sure. But if your new relationship feels a little too good to be true, here are some dating tips and relationship advice to determine if you could be somebody’s rebound.

Relationship Advice On Rebounding

1. Your partner just got out of a long-term relationship. Following a failed relationship, it’s always wise to take some time alone to realign one’s goals and evaluate lessons learned from that experience. This time is valuable to ensure you don’t make the same mistakes in future relationships. But if you are involved with someone who has recently left a long-term relationship, you need to determine if your new partner was ready to move on, or are you simply filling in as the emotional gap? “If you’ve met someone you like that recently got out of a relationship, take it slowly,” advised relationship expert and blogger Alina. “Even if he or she says they are completely over their ex and have moved on, it is in your best interest to take your time getting to know this person a little more before giving yourself the green light to emotionally dive in.”

Related Link: Relationship Advice: 3 Ways To Scratch The Seven-Year Itch

2. The relationship is moving at a fast pace. You may have dated for a short time, but the relationship has already escalated to a highly physical and committed relationship. While you are spending every moment together and talking about your future, consider how well you know this person. If this relationship is moving at rocket speed despite the fact you know very little about your partner, you may be the rebound for your partner’s crushed heart. “I think I married for the wrong reasons. Instead of following my heart and doing something that made me really happy, I just did it for the idea of everything,” said Britney Spears of her failed marriage to Kevin Federline. She talked about her decision to wed in a 2008 For the Record documentary.

Related Link: Five Ways To Cope With A Relationship Breakdown Just Like The Celebs

3. The former flame is the third member of your relationship. It’s common for people to share stories of old relationships. But if a past love is a common component to your romantic dinners, this could be a sign that he or she hasn’t moved on from that former relationship. It’s likely you are a vehicle in helping your partner get back with the person they truly want to be with. The staff at offered relationship advice with the following scenario as a warning: “He talks about his ex all the time. He mentions that you look like her, or that your mannerisms or interests remind him of her. He takes you places he once took his ex — and tells you so. If he’s still preoccupied with someone else, he’s not ready to fully move on.”

Related Link: Expert Dating Advice: How to Rebound from a Solo Holiday Season

4. Friends are surprised your partner is dating again. You and your partner’s friends are helpful in determining if the person you’re sharing your time with is worthy of that commitment. If you see outsiders shaking their heads at the relationship, it may be a warning sign. The staff at eHarmony warn that the new relationship “may be poorly timed and concur that sometimes it’s wise to trust the red flags coming from others.” Finding someone to share your life with is a gift. But if the foundation for that new relationship is sitting on shaky ground, it is destined to fall.

By being aware of your new love’s past, keeping control of the pace, ensuring former partners are out of the picture, and measuring the reactions of others who care about you and your partner, you are lined up to score big on the relationship front rather than being sidelined as a rebound.

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