By Lori Zaslow and Jennifer Zucher for Project Soulmate
We have all had a friend that falls head over heels for a guy that you can’t stand to be around. But what happens when that friend is you? There is nothing worse that falling in love with a guy that your best friends hate to be around. As relationship experts, we know that, if the people around you think that you’re making a mistake in your relationship and love, they might be right.
Love Advice: Relationship Experts on Friends versus Boyfriend
Here is our love advice for what to do when your friends don’t quite love your partner like you do:
1. Take a step back: A lot of times, when you fall hard and fast for someone, you become blinded by love and overlook a lot of qualities that are important to have in a partner. You should hear what your friends have to say and really listen to the points that they make. At the end of the day, they have your best interests at heart. Our love advice is simple: Instead of making excuses for your man and getting defensive, take the time to listen to your friends’ arguments and start to really pay attention to the points that they make. You might start to see your partner in a different light.
Related Link: Expert Dating Advice: 5 Signs He’s Mr. Now and Not Mr. Right
2. Set initial intentions: It’s important to truly listen to the points that your friends make because you don’t want to end a good thing for a bad reason. If your friends are jealous that you’re spending more time with him or have been dying for a boyfriend, but you snatched one up first — be wary. While we like to think that our buddies always have our backs, sometimes, jealousy can play a factor in their decision to not like your boyfriend. This situation is also fixable. Our dating advice is to balance the amount of time you spend with your friends and your man, as difficult as that may be. And make sure you tell your friends how happy he makes you. If they truly love you, they will understand and be happy for you.
Related Link:Â Love Advice: You Love It, He Loves It Not
3. Make a choice: You have to expect that not all of your friends are going to quickly fall in love with your boyfriend the way that you did. Your pals might be more cautious because they want to make sure that he treats you the way that you deserve to be treated and that he really makes you happy. You should ask your friends what they really think and why they feel that way, because sometimes your googly eyes may blind you from the truth. And while your friends may be right about your man, you have to follow your heart and find out the truth for yourself.
Your buddies should respect your decision either way and be there for you, even if you have to separate yourself for a while to see where things can go with your boyfriend. Remember that you can love your girlfriends and your boyfriend even if they don’t love each other. Neither of them should make you choose if they really want you to be happy.
Relationship experts Lori Zaslow and Jennifer Zucher are BRAVO TV’s Love Brokers and founders of Project Soulmate, a high-end New York-based matchmaking company.
