Dating Advice: I’m Never Single. Is it Bad to Go From One Relationship to the Next?

By Joshua Pompey

There’s no doubt that single life can be a bit unsettling at times.  In this day and age of swiping left and right- where sexual deviants and creepy singles are running rampant, sometimes the mere thought of staying single for a few months can feel like an eternity. And I’m sure with the emails some of you women receive on a daily basis on dating websites, it’s a wonder that some of you are even able to maintain faith in the prospect of a relationship. So when a nice guy comes along as a potential partner, I can’t blame you for wanting to dive right in. Great men are scarce, so why not jump at the opportunity when you see one right? As a relationship expert and matchmaker, I need to caution you that there’s a problem with this. Jumping from relationship to relationship without ever exploring the single world, it’s nearly impossible to learn who you are and what your needs are. Therefore, you’re placing the need for a relationship over your ultimate needs in a relationship.  And this can become very problematic down the road. If you don’t want this to happen to you, take note of the following dating advice. 

Dating Advice For Those Who Are Never Single

When I think of those who are always jumping from relationship to relationship, I always think of a former friend of mine who I unfortunately lost touch with a few years back.  For the sake of this article, let’s just refer to her as Jessica. Jessica was an extremely funny, extremely attractive, and an all-around quality catch.  Why didn’t I ever date her?  Well, truth be told, I never even had the chance to try. Jessica had spent pretty much her entire adult life in a relationship. After breaking up with her boyfriend of four years slightly after college, she was single for another two weeks before entering another relationship that lasted four years, and then waited another two weeks before meeting the man she ultimately married.

Related Link: Dating Advice: Do Pick Up Lines Actually Work?

Happy ending right?  Well, it depends on the way you look at it. Truth be told, every single man she was ever with, including her husband, were good guys. They were nice, respectful, and never really did anything bad to her. At least that was the perspective my friends and I had from the outside. But at the same time, they never really seemed to have much in common. There was never any spark. Never any magic. Nothing that made you look at her past boyfriends or her now husband and say, ‘Wow, they are great together!’ It was always just two nice people that happened to find each other, got along, and continued onwards in that manner. Is she happy to this day? This is a question I can’t answer for certain. I guess if someone thinks he or she is happy that’s all that matters right? But as a matchmaker I ask the more important question, which is how much happier could she have been if she truly dedicated herself to finding a great match and not just an acceptable match all her life?

Related Link: Relationship Advice: How To Handle Single-Shaming

My point is, finding someone who is nice or that you get along with isn’t good enough. Nor is jumping from relationship to relationship with a person who doesn’t treat you well or with the respect you deserve. Finding the right person is a process that takes time, dedication, and the ability to understand who you are and what your needs are. And the only way to truly figure out your needs is by being single, dating around a bit, and learning about yourself.  So have fun being single for a bit and take your time out there with the dating tips I’ve provided. You never know, you just might enjoy it!

For more information from Joshua Pompey, visit Next Evolution Matchmaking,  where you can learn how he is changing the landscaping of traditional matchmaking.  Learn more here!