Cupid's Pulse Article: How to Stop Being a Serial DaterCupid's Pulse Article: How to Stop Being a Serial Dater

By Sarah Batcheller

You’ve got your calendar filled to the brim with dates, and each one gets a totally different outfit because each one is with a totally different guy. Funk Rock Guy brings you to his favorite music venue/coffee and wine bar; Politically Informed Guy invites you to a live podcast recording; and Health Nut Guy takes you on a breathtaking hike…all in one week! You’re having the time of your life until you realize you’re becoming the Zodiac of serial dating, and you know you’ll never find The One if you’ve always got two, three, and four lined up. As always, Cupid is here to help! Here are five tips on how to stop being a serial dater:

1. Raise your standards: You’ll have less viable options if you sort out the ones who you know just aren’t the right fit for you. If Funk Rock Guy is touring too much for you two to ever have a foreseeable, solid relationship, then it’s probably not worth compromising a potential relationship with someone else just to have a fling.

Related Link: Are Your Dating Standards Too High?

2. Get to know them better: You can’t sort out the soft, brown apples and find the shiny, red ones if you haven’t climbed the tree. Make time to communicate with potential beaus rather than just hop around from date to date. It’s important to talk to each other when you’re not both distracted by laser tag or sitting in silence in a movie. Quality conversation will allow you to determine what kind of partner they are and if they’re a good fit for you in the long run.

3. Limit your time for dating: We know, it sounds horribly boring, and you can’t imagine why we’d ever say this to you. But there’s a whole world out there for you to grab by the horns, and the love of your life will want to know all of your knowledge and passions. Ditch the dates you know won’t make it past three weeks and spend that time on yourself. You may even want to pick certain days of the week for dating so that you know you won’t go overboard.

Related Link: Signs Your Crush Is Into You

4. Know when to say no: If you know you’ve already got a couple dates on the books, then it’s best to slow it down a little. If you’ve been raising your standards, it shouldn’t be hard to say no to some of your requests. Don’t feel bad for rejecting someone if you know you won’t be able to give them your full attention. It’s better to have just a couple dates lined up so that you have enough time with each person to accurately determine who is best for you

5. Don’t cling to fantasies: You’ll be searching forever if you’ve got a fantasy guy stuck in your mind. Stubbornly clinging to the mere idea of a perfect man will keep you going from guy to guy when you’re not finding exactly what you want. Instead, loosen up your constraints and be open to whatever kind of person he may be. You’ll have more opportunity to find genuine happiness with just one person.

Cupid wants to know: How did you stop being a serial dater? Tell us in the comments below!