Cupid's Pulse Article: The Bachelor 17, Episode 3: The Good, The Bad and The UglyCupid's Pulse Article: The Bachelor 17, Episode 3: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

By Jared Sais and Erika Nitz

The Bachelor was action-packed and filled with a lot of underlying emotions that presented themselves nonverbally. No clear winner is coming out of the pack just yet, but let’s touch on the the good, the bad and the ugly of last night’s episode…

The Good

Lesley M.

Sean looks at Lesley like she’s the eighth Wonder of the World, and they are definitely hitting it off. After all, their first kiss broke the Guinness record for the longest on-camera kiss. It started out cute with both of them blushing and smirking a lot, but it quickly became awkward. Leslie’s hand in the middle of his chest seemed to have a slight hint of “pushing away.” There was no real emotion, which is to be expected when you have a large audience cheering for you.

Their second kiss made up in emotion what the first one lacked. While rubbing Sean’s head (her favorite move), her entire body and legs are fully facing her guy. This girl is falling hard! That second kiss could have easily escalated into something more.

Remember that important things get held close to the body. When Lesley and Sean kissed on the rooftop, she had a tight grasp on Sean but a light grasp on the rose, as it’s tilted away from her.  This indicates that Lesley’s priority is the man and not the rose.

On a psychological note, it’s worth pointing out that Lesley has a lot of similarities with Emily Maynard, who dumped Sean in season eight of The Bachelorette. It will be interesting to see if he picks someone similar to a woman who rejected him in the past.


When Sean is truly happy, his veins show above his eyes and on his forehead. If you don’t see them, he’s putting on a show. During Sean’s interaction with AshLee, this was happening constantly, and he can’t stop smiling when they’re together. What does that mean? It means Sean had a really good time with AshLee, and Lesley M. might have some serious competition. No way of telling if AshLee is The One yet, but she is getting a lot of positive non-verbal cues from Sean.

Related Link: Host Chris Harrison Says New ‘Bachelor’ Sean Lowe Is “So Sincere”

The Bad


Desiree called out Amanda, and a lot was revealed in the fight for the rose. It is clear that having a rose is more important to Amanda than having Sean. In this scenario, however, Desiree is the bad one. Even though she got Sean’s last rose, there is something a bit off about Desiree. When talking to Sean, she gives weird looks and has a creepy tone to her voice. Sean, beware! You might want to steer clear…that is unless you like your women a little bit crazy (see Lindsay below).

The Ugly


Kacie went from golden girl to bottom of the barrel in one conversation. She would have had the upper hand, landing in the top five, if it wasn’t for the story she had shared with Sean. When Kacie told him about the drama between Desiree and Amanda, she unknowingly removed her halo and associated herself with the negativity of the other two ladies. In the past, blameless bearers of bad news were forever associated with the messages they reported. The origins of the age old phrase “don’t shoot the messenger!” came about because of this negative psychological association.

Related Link: The Bachelor 17, Episode 2: Love or Lies?


Kacie’s unintentional downgrade of herself as well as Desiree and Amanda left Lindsay unscathed. Subsequently, she received the rose on the group date.

Dear, sweet, and slightly crazy Lindsay showed up on the first night in a wedding dress and regularly brings up marriage in conversation. The average person would run for the hills in this scenario, but Sean seems to be sticking around, leaving us to think that he might like his girls a little too close to the deep end.

It’s a good thing that The Bachelor series allows Sean to have multiple dates. A girl can only hide her true self for a short period of time before cracks start to appear. Between Lindsay, Kacie and Desiree, the plot thickens as true colors begin to emerge.

On a final note, Sean is playing his own psychological game. For example, while AshLee was sharing a deeply emotional story about her adoption with him, he chimed in with a perfectly timed comment about how he would like to adopt. Additionally, in one moment, we’ll hear him say, “I could be falling for her,” and in the very next moment, he’s kissing a different girl. Sean is toying with these women and showing that the person who’s playing the game of The Bachelor the best…is the bachelor himself!

Jared Sais is co-author of the website The Non-Verbal Game along with Passport To Love TV Host Erika Nitz. He is an expert in nonverbal communications, body language and micro-expressions as they relate to life and love. For more information and to download a free PDF of the speech they gave at NYC’s Single In Stilettos, visit