Cupid's Pulse Article: 4 Tips To Reduce New Year’s Eve Dating AnxietyCupid's Pulse Article: 4 Tips To Reduce New Year’s Eve Dating Anxiety

By Dr. Tranquility — Lydia Belton, PhD, Ct. H.A.

We have all experienced an New Year’s Eve that we look back on with regrets. This is largely due to the fact that we invest too much into trying to make this one day the most perfect of the year — when in truth, it’s really no different than the other 364 days. Here are some tips to help you have an anxiety-free New Year’s Eve this year.

1. Plan Ahead. Lots of restaurants, clubs and various event venues book up early, so make certain that you make reservations or purchase tickets ahead of time. You can always bring a friend with you, which is a great idea and certainly guarantees a much better evening than a forced date. Regardless of whom you decide to celebrate with, have a discussion about what you both would enjoy doing and make a plan.

If you need some ideas, search online for New Year’s Eve activities for adults and children in your town. If you like to travel, take a cue from the stars: Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie will be traveling with the kids, while J. Lo, Casper Smart & the twins will be in Melbourne, Australia. Or you could plan a party of your own. If finances are tight, make it a BYOB and/or a potluck get-together.

Related Link: Three Steps to Stress Free Holiday Dating

2. Why Accept A Date Simply For The Sake Of Having One? This is a common mistake made on both this holiday and Valentine’s Day. If you have no significant other in your life, it’s a great time to simply hang out with friends. We often feel that we have to have a great date, but usually, this just creates a lot of pressure that leads to us choosing the wrong partner.

Another mistake that can often be made is going back to an old lover. Set healthy boundaries. If this person was physically, mentally abusive or even inconsiderate, DO NOT ever give them a chance again. It can be easy to think that it will be different this time, but 99 percent of the time, it won’t be. Remember: this is a holiday to move forward, and if the wrong lover is clogging your path, there isn’t room for the new one to come along.

3. Go Forward, Not Backward. Rather than spend the holidays with a negative and abusive partner, who I allowed into my life longer than I should have because he was tied into my companies, I checked my boundaries to make sure they were set correctly. I discovered that I was tolerating too much, so I reset them. As I have said before, you must let go of what doesn’t work so that the right people can come into your life. In a couple of days, I had a new backer with massive funding for the New Year. He became a friend and a life partner, and I have never been happier. Give this story some thought before backtracking again!

Related Link: Get Back In the Dating Game This New Year

4. Be Proactive! Don’t wait for the phone to ring. Instead, get out there and set your action plan. I recommend a plan A & plan B; then, determine how much time you will allow for plan A to kick in before you move to plan B. You should make your plans at least two weeks before New Year’s Eve. If someone doesn’t want to make plans in advance, he or she is “shelving” you, and we all deserve better than mistreatment.

Allowing yourself to have fun with friends can be a much better launch to your new year than forcing that dream date to occur. No matter what you do on New Year’s Eve, take a moment during this time to visualize your goals and hopes for the next year. See yourself living the life you want!

Enjoy some holiday freebies from your goodie bag and schedule your free session by simply mentioning this post. Developed by Lydia Belton PhD, Ct.H.A., Date Therapy® is an effective protocol that helps people get in touch with their criteria for an ideal mate. DrTranquility’s protocols® have been featured most recently on & Yahoo,, ABC’s the View, KISS FM,, Metromix for the Chicago Tribune, British Glamour, REDBOOK, Cosmopolitan Magazine & promoted by