Cupid's Pulse Article: Top Dating Secrets of MenCupid's Pulse Article: Top Dating Secrets of Men

By Robert Manni

When you’re looking for Mr. Right, it’s easy to wonder for what the men you meet are looking. What are men’s deepest and darkest dating secrets? Take it from a guy: there are quite a few things to keep in mind when men are looking for their new partner. Here are some of the tastiest tidbits about the inner workings of men on the prowl:

Related: The Truth About Men

1. Men are insecure: No matter how self-assured they seem, guys don’t think like women do. They’re often clueless about the opposite sex. When a guy approaches a woman that he’s attracted to, it shows. This can sometimes be exciting and nerve-wracking for a man, but it definitely gives women the upper hand. Remember that you’re always in control of a man’s insecurity and use that to your advantage.

2.  Men like women to “help out”: Though most guys love hunting for a girlfriend, they’re not always great at realizing that they’ve succeeded. Since it can be hard for men to read your signals, use easy ones to show your feelings. Nothing works better than a touch on his arm or a smoldering glance.

3. Men don’t pay attention: Success with women is often about subtle little things, but men don’t always notice those. For example, men might think they have to solve your problems when all you want to do is talk about your day. Make sure he’s paying attention to your intentions by any means possible. Don’t be afraid to tell him exactly what you mean.

4. Guys are still visual: This shouldn’t come as a surprise. When you’re trying to find a boyfriend, save the sweatpants and wear some of your nicer clothes. Don’t be afraid to show your feminine side; men will appreciate it. Even after you’ve been with someone for a while, it’s nice to dress up every now and again.

5. Men love their sense of humor: If you’re already interested in a guy, chances are you already find his humor clever. However, if you’re not enjoying his jokes, it’s probably best to move on. Men have a hard time relating to someone who doesn’t enjoy their humor.

6. When a guy says he’ll call, he means it: Men are usually honest about future plans, but they can be easily distracted. If he says he’ll call after the first date, be sure to ask him when. By making this more concrete, you’ll help him remember you. If he still doesn’t call, forget him. You deserve better.

7. Men dread Valentine’s Day: Valentine’s Day is a holiday that can make men very nervous, largely because of great pressure of finding the right gift for his sweetie. Don’t encourage him to find clothes. When he shops for you, he’ll probably be checking out other women to figure out your size, and that’s sure to make you uncomfortable even if his intentions are good. Try your best to make shopping easier for him by giving him information before he leaves.

8. When it comes to getting physical, timing is everything: Whether it takes two drinks or ten dates, you both know when it’s time to have get intimate with one another. However eager he seems, taking doing this too quickly can make him think of you as being “easy,” and no one wants that. Be sure to think carefully about how long you want to wait.

9. The way to his heart is food: Even if you’re not an amazing cook, men love to eat. Make that work for you by preparing a special meal or inviting him to a restaurant you think he’ll love.

Related: 4 Things Men Worry About

10. He wants a lady he can take home to mom: Ultimately, a man wants to show off his woman to his friends, family and business associates. Remember that no matter how happy he seems with sex, men are looking for a relationship in the same way you are. Though their paths are often different than those taken by women, a family and a future both still matter to men.

11. Don’t change for any man: This is the most essential tip for making both you and your beau happy. Don’t try to be someone you’re not. When you’re not acting like yourself, you’re definitely going to upset both of you. Be the best version of you and he’ll be happy. If he isn’t, he’s not right for you at all.

Have you taken advantage of any of these dating secrets? Tell us below.

Robert Manni is President of Agent16, a New York advertising agency in midtown Manhattan.  Over the past two decades he has watched, played and succeeded in Madison Avenue’s relentlessly changing game. A true devotee of New York City, Robert is inspired by and remains in awe of its people, energy, attitude, and romantic backdrop. He is a world traveler, Reiki Master and teacher, certified advanced clinical Master Hypnotist, graduate of the Jose Silva Method/Life System, NYC Marathoner, and a bona fide ‘Guy’s Guy’ who somehow survived twenty years of single life in the big city. THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE is Robert’s debut novel. He is currently working on his second book.  Visit his website at for up-to-date news, to read his blog and check out his videos.  You can also become a fan on, or follow Robert on