Cupid's Pulse Article: The Holidays: 8 Ways to Ruin Your RelationshipCupid's Pulse Article: The Holidays: 8 Ways to Ruin Your Relationship

By SMF Marcus Osborne for

It’s well documented that the holidays are the toughest time of the year for millions of people.  Depression rates skyrocket because people confront various personal demons and/or a multitude of interpersonal crises.

This got me to thinking about the myriad of ways the holidays can be ruined when you’re in a relationship.  I sat down with one of my partners at, Matt Staudt, and we came up with a pretty strong list of 8.  Now, once we’d finished the list, with perhaps a couple of exceptions, it was clear that men and women probably aren’t that different when it comes to this topic.  You be the judge.

1. Not “Keeping It Real:  Don’t be coy about your excitement surrounding the holidays.  Let’s not pretend like it’s not a big deal when it really is a big deal.  Don’t say, “Oh, the holidays don’t really matter to me” and then when your guy decides to boycott the commercialism of the holidays by boycotting your gift – don’t get mad!

2. Being shallow: Your guy has gotten you a gift.  The correct and proper response is “Thank You.”  Don’t be the woman whose holiday cheer is grounded in the price tag of said gift.  Hey look, the economy is in the tank.  Remember it’s the thought that counts (allegedly) so try to be appreciative.  This shouldn’t need to be said – but unfortunately this is one holiday tenet we often forget.  Whether he got the gift off of Ebay, the clearance rack, or Tiffany’s – he got it for you.  Of course if he spent 20 bucks on your gift but buys himself a two-thousand dollar flatscreen there may be reason to gripe.

3. Don’t Take Him Shopping:  This is cliché but absolutely on point.  Shopping is mostly recreational for women.  For guys not so much.  There are few experiences less thrilling than standing around department stores for two hours.  Although it seems that many stores have gotten hip to the man’s waiting game dilemma by setting up “man areas” where there’s mens magazines and a couch for the guys who happen to be in shopping purgatory.

4. Pulling Out The Baggage:  We’ve all got our personal “stuff.”  The holidays sometimes dredges up old feelings about an ex or some other notable experience from your past.  You may feel an intense urge to bring those issues up while we’re decorating the Christmas tree.  Please resist that urge.  Let’s talk about it after New Year’s Day.  This is supposed to be the season of joy.  Save the baggage for a trip.

5. Selfish Hint Gifts:  Oh you don’t know what “hint gifts” are?  You’ve been telling me to lose weight for the last six months.  Christmas morning you give me a gift card for one free round of liposuction.  “Hint Gift.”  I’ve been out of work for 6 months, Christmas morning you hand me a ribbon-wrapped Starbucks application.  Hint gift.  Big no-no.

6: Don’t Hate On Dinner:  You may not like his mom’s cooking.  Suck it up and keep it in.  There are no winners in that game.  Unless you’re planning a break up that night, let it go and keep that opinion to yourself at least until the holidays are over.

7. Holiday Break Up: Pretty self-explanatory.

8. Dying: Yeah, this is a pretty dark thought but also pretty self-explanatory.  Actually, this particular one has been known to be a downer all year-round.

Ok, your turn….your worst holiday break up or near break up story.  Share!