By Mara Miller
It’s normal for a woman to feel sad, anxious, lonely, or tired after her new bundle of joy has been delivered, but usually those feelings goes away fairly quickly. For some mothers, it becomes much more severe, affecting one out of seven women. Postpartum depression can take affect months after the baby is born. It also doesn’t affect only new mothers; it can affect someone who already has children. The disease can be so serious that some mothers have taken their lives because they couldn’t get the help they needed.
Parenting Advice: Postpartum depression can be a scary, frustrating time for the whole family. Here are 7 ways you can help your partner cope.
It can be hard to know what to do in this situation when you don’t know how your partner will feel from day to day. Here are some ways you can help make your partner’s life easier:
1. Listen to her: Her anxiety is sky high right now. She might feel like her ability to be a good mom isn’t there and that you and the baby would be better off without her. You don’t have to give her resolutions or ways to do better; you just need to listen.
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2. Make sure she rests: It’s easy to lose sleep when there is a new baby in the house, especially for the mother. Make her stay in bed a little longer while you take over for the midnight feedings or in the middle of the day if she needs to recharge.
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3. Seek help elsewhere:Â Asking for help from a trusted friend or family member isn’t wrong. If your partner needs help taking care of the baby, making sure she has a support system besides yourself is important. Friends can also be a good motivator to get her up and out of the house to shop, have lunch, and feel normal while you bond with the baby at home.
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4. Help around the house: It can be easy to let the household chores all fall on your partner. Do not do this to her. Get a baby sling, attach your little one to your chest, and cook some dinner for Mom while she fits in a nap. Take the dogs for a walk. If you have older children, some extra time watching TV or playing outside while she relaxes won’t hurt either.
5. Don’t forget to spend time alone: Get a babysitter when the baby is old enough, and take her out on a date. She might feel fat and want to wallow in her own misery right now, but don’t let her. She needs time alone with you so she can feel like the beautiful human you fell in love with again.
6. Make her feel supported and safe:Â The experience of postpartum can be lonely for the mother because she devalues her self-worth. Tell her she’s doing a good job with a baby. If she gets angry, ask her why she feels angry.
7. Do research: The more you know about postpartum depression, the more you can help your partner. You can also find support groups and hotlines to help. And yes, this includes finding a therapist who can prescribe medication to help if necessary.
What are some other ways you can help your partner through postpartum depression? Share your tips below.