Excerpt from NYC-based divorce lawyer Jacqueline Newman’s book Soon-to-Be Ex for Men: Preserving Wealth, Fatherhood, and Sanity during Divorce
The signs that a divorce may be on the mind of your spouse has the potential to show itself in different ways, depending on if you are a man or a woman. When it comes to men, signs may present in the form of financial shenanigans.
Here are five signs men need to watch out for when it comes an impending divorce:
Your partner is no longer Mrs. Chatterbox.
You need to be aware and realize it is a bad thing if your spouse starts to shut down verbally. Is she beginning to no longer talk to you about her day or what is going on in her life? If she stops complaining, that can also be a bad sign.
Related Link: Should You Date Someone Going Through a Divorce?
She is always annoyed.
Let’s face it—you can be annoying (just as she can be). And therefore, she is often irritated with you. However, what is happening now is different. She is annoyed on a whole new level and all the time. This is not the simple “Turn the TV down! Are you deaf?” exasperation; this is the “Do you have to breathe so loudly and so often” line of questioning.
She has taken on a great interest in many things—except you.
There is nothing wrong with someone taking an interest in a new hobby or venture. What is not normal is when one partner seemingly has moved on to finding a new singular interest, hanging out with friends you do not know, traveling solo, or otherwise engaging in hobbies that do not involve you—and furthermore, places no focus on even trying to include you.
Related Link: What Now? Transitioning from Married to Single
She suddenly has a new interest in the finances.
If you have always been the spouse who paid the bills and handled the money and now she has taken a sudden interest in the family finances, it is normal for you to wonder why.
Indications point to the cheating component.
If your spouse becomes really possessive of her electronic devices, is abruptly required to “work late,” suddenly has a ton of business dinners to attend, is more concerned about her appearance, or is even overcompensating when it comes to your relationship, you must pay attention.
Just because your spouse may be doing something on this list does not automatically mean your marriage is over. Try to understand what is causing your spouse’s new or strange behavior. Remember to stay alert. It is always a wise strategy to become fully aware about what is going on so you are not shocked when divorce papers suddenly turn up on your dining room table and your wife’s toothbrush is gone
Jacqueline Newman is a New York City based divorce lawyer and experienced NY matrimonial law expert. As managing partner of a top tier 5th Avenue Manhattan law firm focused exclusively on divorce, her practice runs the gamut from prenups for high net worth people contemplating marriage to high conflict matrimonial litigation in dissolutions involving complex financial assets and difficult custody issues. She is the author of “Soon-to-Be Ex: A Woman’s Guide to Her Perfect Divorce and Relaunch” & “Soon-to-Be Ex for Men: Preserving Wealth, Fatherhood, and Sanity during Divorce.”
