Taking a cue from some of our favorite celebrity couples — Kaley Cuoco and Ryan Sweeting, Kate Hudson and Matt Bellamy, and Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson, to name a few — we thought it’d be fun to explore the benefits and pitfalls of quickie engagements. Plus, it’s a topic our executive editor knows quite well: She got engaged to her now-husband after only nine weeks of dating! It’s not a decision to make lightly though. Here are three pros and three cons of a whirlwind romance — all important things to consider before giving your heart away.
Related Link: Why Celebrities Fall In and Out of Love So Quickly
Pros
1. You tackle the big issues immediately: Under typical dating circumstances, you may not discuss the serious stuff — how many times your heart’s been broken, what you want in a future spouse, how many kids you want — until a few months into your relationship. With a whirlwind romance, you’re forced to get down to the nitty-gritty details if you truly want a future together.
2. There’s no time for apprehension: Every relationship reaches a turning point where it’s easy to let fear control your actions. When you’re falling in love fast, you tend to focus on the good instead of the bad, running to your destiny instead of away from it. “There’s momentum and clear interest,” explains relationship expert Michelle Smith. “Everyone loves being loved, so when the feeling is mutual and obvious, sparks are going to fly.”
3. It’s a refreshing type of love: Sometimes, we can get burdened down with the complications that inevitably come with true love. A whirlwind romance, though, offers you a lightheartedness that’s a great beginning for any relationship. “This fresh and free perspective is important to note,” shares life coach Kimberly Friedmutter. “You’re not weighted down by expectations, and it’s so much easier to breathe and just enjoy yourself.”
Related Link: Dating After Divorce: How Soon is Too Soon?
Cons
1. You may not have a strong foundation: The healthiest relationships are built on a friendship, but if you’ve only known each other for a few weeks, you may not have that solid starting point. “Relationships should get better over time, and you should build on the connection you started with,” says relationship expert Andrea Syrtash. “When you immediately relate in a heightened way, it’s tough to build from there. Whirlwind romances that start too fast can sometimes end too fast…”
2. You miss out on really dating each other: The first few weeks of a relationship, appropriately dubbed the “honeymoon phase,” are filled with light-hearted and carefree experiences. If you jump right into something more serious, you lose this fun time with your partner. It’s easy to combat this potential pitfall: You should “date” your significant other always, whether you’re newly together, engaged, or married.
3. You (or your partner) might be in it for the wrong reasons: If you’re getting over a broken heart or perhaps a bit bored with your current life, it’s tempting to turn to romance to fill that void. After all, there’s nothing like the allure of a handsome Prince Charming and a perfectly-fitted glass slipper! On the flip side, it’s hard to truly know someone you just met, so your partner may be looking for an escape as well.
Have you ever been in a whirlwind romance? Share your story in the comments below!
