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Relationship Expert Tag Archive: Toni Coleman

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May 18, 2016 0

Relationship Advice: Managing Your Adult Child’s Return To The Nest

Posted In: Hope After Divorce Articles, Relationship Experts
Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice: Managing Your Adult Child’s Return To The Nest
Photo: michaeljung / Bigstock.com

By Toni Coleman, LCSW, CMC for Divorce Support Center

It’s that time of the year when young adults are graduating from college, returning home for the summer break, or have decided they want to step back from their lives and return to their parent’s home to rethink their options and future direction. During their absence parents often have a nice rhythm going and fear their life and relationship may be upended and they will end up back in parenting mode now that their adult kids will be under their roof again. If you are facing this challenge right now, the following relationship advice and parenting advice could help you transition to this new adult-to-adult relationship and avoid falling back into old ruts, conflicts, or dysfunctional dynamics.

Relationship Advice On Managing Your Child’s Return Home

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Apr 6, 2016 0

Relationship Advice: Telltale Signs Your Relationship Is One of Convenience

Posted In: Hope After Divorce Articles, Relationship Experts
Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice: Telltale Signs Your Relationship Is One of Convenience
Scowling couple. Photo: mast3r / Bigstock.com

By Toni Coleman, LCSW, CMC for Divorce Support Center

Relationships and marriages differ in many ways. What works for one couple would not be right for another. Therefore, there isn’t one specific set of attributes or descriptors that could be used in a premarital checklist designed to ensure any marriage will be a successful one. However, there are certain traits that are commonly found in relationships that couples describe as happy and satisfying. These often have to do with specific dynamics and qualities that impact how they relate and communicate from day to day. When these are absent or lacking in some way, it can point to a union that continues due to convenience rather than emotional, spiritual, and physical attachment. Here’s some relationship advice that will help you classify your relationship as convenient or sent from Cupid.

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Mar 23, 2016 0

Relationship Advice: What NOT To Do When You’re Upset With Your Partner’s Weight

Posted In: Hope After Divorce Articles, Relationship Experts
Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice: What NOT To Do When You’re Upset With Your Partner’s Weight
Couple biking during sunset. Photo: pressmaster / Bigstock.com

By Toni Coleman, LCSW, CMC for Divorce Support Center

What do celebrities like Oprah Winfrey, Britney Spears, Mariah Carey and Christina Aguilera have in common? They are all beautiful, talented women who have faced public scrutiny as they struggled with their weight. As people age, many struggle with their weight. It seems that between the stress, lack of time and energy, competing work and family demands, poor food choices and eating on the run, a healthy lifestyle often ends up at or near the bottom of many people’s priority lists. This behavior can then be exacerbated when significant others, family and/or friends attribute the problem to the individual’s apathy, lack of motivation or discipline, or an unwillingness or inability to make better choices. All of these assume something negative—which is not only unhelpful, it often leads to a continuing downward spiral. If your partner is not taking care of himself or herself, you may have fallen into using one or more of the following counterproductive strategies. If so, it is time to find positive and healthy ways to offer the support and encouragement your partner needs especially from you with a little relationship advice!

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Jan 27, 2016 0

Relationship Advice: How Your Relationships And Love Impact Your New Year’s Resolutions

Posted In: Hope After Divorce Articles, Relationship Experts
Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice: How Your Relationships And Love Impact Your New Year’s Resolutions
Photo: Subbotina Anna / Bigstock.com

By Toni Coleman, LCSW

Now that we’re closing in on February, it’s a good time to take inventory of how your New Year’s resolutions are progressing, or not. Have you made adjustments to your environment, created a specific plan, tweaked your schedule or set aside time for following through on the short-term objectives that will get you there? If you have done even one of these, it’s a real start. However, if you draw a blank when reading this, you may have already lost your resolve or even forgotten about your goals altogether. If this is the case, and you want to get back on track—it is important to examine where you got off course and what factors may have influenced it.

As a relationship expert, I notice that one variable people may overlook, but that carries a lot of weight, is how much support you get from your relationship and love. In assessing this, it’s important to pay attention to what they do more than what they say. There are many subtle ways that a partner can sabotage your efforts, especially if he or she fears it will impact your shared lifestyle, threatens him in some way, or upset the status quo in general. If you believe this is occurring, consider talking to your partner about what you see happening and ask for help. My relationship advice is to look at the following eight behaviors to assist you in pinpointing and articulating your concerns and then moving toward a productive discussion on how you can best support one another.

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Nov 4, 2015 0

Relationship Advice: Top 6 Contributors to Infidelity

Posted In: Hope After Divorce Articles, Relationship Experts
Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice: Top 6 Contributors to Infidelity
A man in a relationship has an affair. Photo: conrado / Bigstock.com

By Toni Coleman

We read celebrity gossip about infidelity all the time. Sometimes, as in the cases of Debra Messing or Claire Danes, it’s a part of their dating behavior. But what compels a partner to cheat? And why are the perimeters of commitment such a mystery to them? In this article, relationship expert Toni Coleman, LCSW, gives relationship advice and explores the hidden meanings behind infidelity and what we can do to secure our relationships and love.

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Oct 21, 2015 0

Relationship Advice On Financial Infidelity

Posted In: Hope After Divorce Articles, Relationship Experts
Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice On Financial Infidelity
How to discuss finances with your significant other. Photo: dolgachov / Bigstock

By Toni Coleman

While celebrity news cites irreconcilable differences as the final blow for celebrity divorces such as Brandi Glanville of “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills,” actress Kaley Cuoco, and celebrity chef Giada DeLaurentiis, it doesn’t take long for the matter of money to surface as part of the proceedings. Whether finances are openly discussed as an asset to a healthy relationship and love, or used as fodder when your vows start falling in the red, money is an integral part of any marriage.

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Feb 11, 2015 0

Expert Relationship Advice: I’m Divorced, But He’s Married

Posted In: Hope After Divorce Articles, Relationship Experts
Cupid's Pulse Article: Expert Relationship Advice: I’m Divorced, But He’s Married
Disappointed woman. Photo: fabianaponzi / Bigstock.com

By Toni Coleman, LCSW, CMC for Hope After Divorce

I recently received the letter below and offered my expert relationship advice in my response.

Expert Relationship Advice from Hope After Divorce

Dear Toni,

Somehow, I have fallen in love with a married man. I know what you must be thinking: that if I knew he was married, and I walked into it anyway, I did this to myself and need to just accept the consequences. If so, you would be right, but I honestly didn’t have the intent to go down this path. It more or less evolved from us being co-workers and friends. Ironically, he was the one who I leaned on a lot through my ex’s infidelity and subsequent divorce. It was a time of great vulnerability for me, and he was just so great; in fact, he was everything my ex had never been. After hours of talking, long lunches, drinks after work and an increased frequency in texting, we shared a kiss. From there, it was too easy.
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