By Chau Nguyen, “America’s Hottest Dating Coach”
No parents, no rules and unlimited alcohol can trigger a lot of heartbreaks for many unsuspecting college students. Look at what happened to Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez. They have great songs, but their relationship is a train wreck! Protect yourself by learning the top 3 common mistakes college students make in dating.
1. Thinking that dating doesn’t exist in college anymore.
I’ve interviewed hundreds of college students and asked them one question, “Does dating still exist in college?” Some students would tell me, “Of course! I’m in a relationship right now,” and others would say, “No way! Dating is taboo in college.”
Everyone has an opinion on this topic, but the truth is that dating does exist in college.
Even if all of your college friends are hooking up, there are many others who are in exclusive relationships. So if you want to be in a serious relationship, remember there are guys who are looking for the exact same thing right now.
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2. Believing that you have to put out.
One college woman at the University of California, Irvine told me, “All the girls are putting out, so if I don’t do it, I can’t compete with them.”
All her friends immediately nodded in agreement. That’s a huge misconception among smart and beautiful college women. If they just want to explore their sexuality, then by all means, be safe and have fun! But many of the guys I interviewed told me that they would never consider getting serious with a woman after having a one-night stand with her.
Is that a double-standard? Completely. It’s not fair for women, and I can sympathize with that. That’s why the best cure for this is to control the pace of the interaction.
Women do have the power to veto. If you think he’s moving too fast, stop him. He will respect you for standing your ground, and more importantly, you will respect yourself more.
Related: Returning to the Dating World
3. Waiting too long to bring up the “relationship status” talk.
Most women understandably hesitate to bring this topic up because they worry that it might scare the guy away. So they just play along until they find out that he’s been hooking up with other girls on the side.
You don’t have to force him to be your boyfriend the first day you meet him. But you need to make one thing very clear early on–is this going to be an exclusive relationship, or are you both free to date other people too? Just be sure to approach him from a place of confidence.
Tell him, “Hey, I’m curious. We obviously like each other. So where is this going?”
If he wants to be exclusive with you, you’ve hit the jackpot! If he doesn’t, you’ve saved yourself a lot of time, energy, and heartache. Either way, it’s a win-win situation for you.
Chau Nguyen, “America’s #1 Dating Coach for Tech Guys,” helps men and women skyrocket their confidence and succeed in dating. He is the founder of The One Who Gets It. For more information, please visit www.TheOneWhoGetsIt.com
