By Lori Zaslow and Jennifer Zucher, founders of Project Soulmate
Although first dates can seem scary, in reality, first dates are a science that can be easily mastered with just a few pointers. Once you feel confident about the first date, the option of a second date is inevitable. The main thing to remember is the key to the first date is being positive. This may sound cliché, but it’s true: positivity is an extremely attractive quality.
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To appear positive on a first date, focus on topics that you are passionate about and things that make you happy. This technique will show that you’re a cheerful person who has depth. Being upbeat keeps the conversation light but not shallow. It’s also a good way to find common interests with your date. However, if your major interest is politics, then you should probably choose a different route and talk about something else. Anything political can be unintentionally polarizing!
If you’re too critical, you’ll sabotage your date. The person you’re interacting with doesn’t know you (it is a first date), and it’s way too soon to burden them with your emotional baggage or negativity. If you find yourself turning to downbeat topics, take a step back and change the course to something more light-hearted.
Another first date necessity is steering clear of both the friend and slut zones. To avoid the friend zone, try a lingering gaze, a flirty smile or even a quick touch, like a brushing of their arm. With that being said, there is a distinct line between flirty and slutty. Don’t overdo sexual innuendos or be overly suggestive. Definitely don’t sleep together on a first date if you’re hoping for a second date. If you actually like this guy and the date went well, he should be excited to take you out on a second date without the expectation of sex afterward.
The next piece of advice for landing a second date is limiting alcohol intake on your first date. If you drink too much, you’ll most definitely say or do something that is uncharacteristic to who you are and will embarrass you. And let’s be honest, alcohol usually makes us much more likely to hook up!
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And the MOST important advice about landing a second date is to just be yourself! It’s awkward and difficult to act like someone you aren’t. Plus, why would you want to go on a second date with a guy who doesn’t like you for you? After all, you’re trying to find someone who likes, and maybe even will come to love, you for who you are, not for the façade you built on the first date.
If you follow these pointers, you are practically guaranteed an offer of a second date. And if this guy is worthy of you, always take the second date – you never know if Mr. Right is right in front of you.
For more information about Project Soulmate, click here.Â