Question from Kaitlin B.: It sounds silly, but I think a lot about my texts before I send them to a guy I’ve just met. When and how do I play hard to get while texting? What things should I consider before pressing send?
Read on to find out what our relationship experts think!
Dating Advice from Our Relationship Experts
Suzanne K. Oshima, Matchmaker: I think it’s interesting that you prefaced your question with “it sounds silly”…and the reason why I bring that up is because I think deep down you know this is completely silly! You’re thinking way too much about what you should or shouldn’t do when it comes to texting a guy, which is probably taking all the fun out of the beginning stages of dating and just getting to know him.
If a guy really likes you, whatever you write in a text is very rarely going to change how he feels. However, if you play too many games and play hard to get, you’re more likely to lose him than to get into a relationship with him. Here’s my best dating advice: Stop thinking too much about what/how/when to text him and just go with the flow. You might win him over by being yourself!
Related Link: Is It Okay If My Boyfriend Texts His Ex?
Paige Wyatt, Reality Star: It’s very easy to overthink when it comes to texting someone you’ve just met. It’s important to note that you don’t always have to play hard to get. Sometimes, it’s better to just act like yourself and reply back without too much thought. If you feel like you need to do a little more to keep this person interested, don’t reply back right away; it can be enticing if you don’t seem too available. You don’t want them to think they don’t have a chance with you, but you can let them know that you have your own life and that you’re a busy girl.
If you still want to play hard to get, don’t be too cold. Remember that it’s called “hard to get,” not “never get!” My best dating advice is to make sure they know you’re in demand but that you’re also willing to make time to see or talk to them.
Related Link: Dating Advice: Is It Bad to Double-Text a Guy?
Robert Manni, Guy’s Guy: The most important consideration is if texting is the best way to play hard to get. The written word, particularly emails and texts, can be easily misinterpreted. Playing a finesse game like “hard to get” can be challenging when the playing field is limited to a few brief words and phrases. If setting the hook and making a real connection is your goal, I suggest a phone call or, better yet, meeting up in person. Remember that guys are visual. There is no better way to make a man want to see you more than by looking into his eyes and smiling.
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How do you play hard to get when texting a new guy? Share your dating advice with us in the comments below!
