By David Wygant
Congratulations! You’re now in a relationship with a mama’s boy. Mama’s boys are tough to date. Mommy took such good care of them over the years, and while she’s still in their lives, you might always play second fiddle to her.
I know all about mama’s boys because my dad was one. I remember when we used to go out to the Hampton’s during the summer. My dad would have his own special blueberries and sugar on top. His mom, my grandmother, would always reserve the coffee ice cream for him, her king. She catered everything to him. He’d call her at least three or four times a day. It was like he couldn’t stand not having contact with her for even a couple of hours.
When you’re dating a mama’s boy, you’re going to be under such a powerful microscope, and you can never win because nothing will ever be good enough for her “sweet little boy.” Moms sometimes cradle and pander to their boys, no matter how old they are. Not just that, but they give them their full backing and support, even when they’ve done something wrong.
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It’s almost too much. He’s used to being catered to, and he’s used to having everything done for them. I’ve even known grown men who still take their laundry home for their moms to do. Some let mom come over to their place and tidy it up for them too!
I’ve heard many nightmare stories about girlfriends moving into their boyfriend’s house and buying some new furniture and decor, only to come home one day and find out it’s all been moved. Mom came over, decided she didn’t like what you chose, and replaced it with all her own stuff.
Don’t get me wrong though! Mama’s boys have some great qualities too. They’re gentle, they’re sweet, and they’re respectful.
The big problem is you may be used to dating a man-boy, someone who has struggled to leave the nest. He’s a boy at heart who can’t bear to leave his mom’s side. It’s hard when you’re dating a mama’s boy because you’re going to find he’ll increasingly want you to take over her duties.
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Now, you can try to break the boy out of mama’s cradle, but that’s not going to be easy. He’s lived his entire life this way. He enjoys it, and he expects any woman he dates to treat him the same as his mom does. Are you ready to be in a relationship where you have to mother your partner and his mom knows all your business? If you’re ready for a relationship where your mother-in-law is going to know everything, and you can handle it, then go for it. If you can’t, then you need to think again.
I remember I once dated a daddy’s girl. Nothing I did ever compared to her father. She’d say it all the time too: “Dad did this for me, and Dad did that for me.” I felt like I was competing with her dad, and it drove me crazy. If I ever did anything wrong, her daddy would get a phone call right away.
You want to be the woman in a man’s life, not his caretaker. You don’t want to compete with his mom, and you don’t want to be second best. The next time you meet an amazing guy that happens to be a mama’s boy, you need to ask yourself whether you can put up with this kind of behavior. If not, it’s time to send him on his way and send him back to his mother. She’ll welcome him with open arms!
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