Question from Shelby F.: Whenever a guy and I breakup, I always wonder if I should completely delete him from my life. A part of me thinks it’s a good idea because then I won’t be tempted to see if he’s tagged in any new photos with new girls, but the other part of me doesn’t want him to think I’m so bitter or immature that I can’t stand him coming up on my newsfeed. What should I do?
Answer from Our Love Experts:
Suzanne Oshima, Matchmaker: When it comes to social media and an ex, there really isn’t a clear-cut answer. It really depends on how the relationship ended and how you feel about him. If the relationship ended amicably and you feel you can still be friends with him, then it’s fine to stay connected to him on social media.
However, if the relationship ended on a bad note, then why would you want to torture yourself by seeing him with his new girlfriend? Unfriending him or deleting him really isn’t about being bitter or immature; it’s more about your well being and moving on with your life. What he thinks about it shouldn’t really matter to you, as you are no longer together.
Paige Wyatt, Reality Star: It’s totally understandable if you feel the urge to check up on your ex every once in a while, but know that it’s not healthy. Keeping an eye on him will never give you the chance to completely get over him and move on, especially if he posts pictures with other girls. Seeing him having fun or with another woman will drive you crazy, even if you tell yourself you’re happy for him!
The best thing to do after a break-up is wait until things have settled and neither of you are upset, which might take a few weeks. Then, unfriend him. This way, he won’t think it’s you taking a stab at him, and he will more likely realize you’re just working on getting over him, which is exactly what you’re doing!
Robert Manni, Guy’s Guy: This is a personal decision that is entirely up to you. A lot depends on the individual circumstances of how things went down with each guy. If you had an amicable split and somehow managed to remain friends with your ex (it can be done), then keep your social media lines of communication open. However, if you experienced an uncomfortable break-up that left behind some emotional residue, it might be best to severe your social media ties with him, so you’re not reminded of a bad situation.
Notice I have not mentioned or factored in what he thinks. That’s because this is your decision, and what he thinks about your social media doesn’t really matter. And if it does, then maybe you still have feelings for him.
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Do you delete or unfriend your exes on social networks? Tell us in the comments below!
