Cupid's Pulse Article: Cold Feet Before The Wedding? Reasons to Use Your HeadCupid's Pulse Article: Cold Feet Before The Wedding? Reasons to Use Your Head

By Marie Chan

Marriage is more than just a dreamy, fairy tale event in every woman’s life. Understandably that it is exciting when planning for one especially if you are the bride-to-be. But, this is also the stage where a couple’s relationship is tested. Arguments often come along during the planning stage.  After you have prepared and paid for everything, you feel restless, hyped-up and experience “wedding jitters” the night before your big day. What should you do?

Here are some things to consider if you feel anxious before your wedding.

1. Think deeply about your doubts.

According to a research done by the Psychology graduate students of UCLA, 19 percent of women who reported that they are having doubts before the wedding end up in divorce after four years of married life. It would be best to simply call off the wedding if you are less than one hundred percent sure. It is not wrong at all to back out now than regretting a major decision in your life. So, consider all the factors why you have doubts before your wedding.

2. Talk things out with your partner.

Nothing beats the old fashioned way of talking things out. Couples who last long in marriage often say that communication is the key to a successful relationship. So, if you are feeling the pre-wedding jitters, be open with your partner about it. It would make you feel better having someone to share the mixed emotions before your wedding. Take this opportunity to remind each other of the good things that await you as a couple.

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3. Seek advice from elders.

If you cannot contain the doubts before your wedding, you can seek advice from your parents or close relatives who have been married for many years. The wisdom they have gained through the years can cast a light to the doubts and questions bothering you. It would also help if you choose to confide in someone who you know is not biased.

4. Don’t pressure yourself too much.

It is a good thing that everybody else shares your excitement about getting married. However, it can also add pressure on your part as the bride. Of course, you want your wedding to be perfect. But because of this, you tend to over think things. You worry about even the smallest and insignificant  things. Remember, your wedding is a celebration of your union as man and wife. You should enjoy this day.

Although some brides (and even grooms) feel the cold feet before their wedding, the challenge is how you manage these feelings while keeping yourself composed before, during and after the wedding. Surround yourself with trusted people who knows you well and whom you can really share your feelings honestly. Doubts before the wedding can be easily erased if you think about your real goal as a couple.

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It helps to know that you are not alone, but you have someone to share all your thoughts, doubts and fears. Cold feet before the wedding can be minimized by having a pre-wedding counseling and coordination. Remember when you get married, your life takes on another path wherein it is different than the life you are used to with your parents or yourself. You have to be ready — mentally and emotionally.

However even with all these — you are still experiencing this heavy and negative feeling that you cannot go through with this wedding, then by all means, use your head and call it off. What you feel is not just a simple case of wedding jitters or cold feet. You have to follow your instinct. Clear all doubts before pushing through with it. This way, you will avoid making costly mistakes in life.

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