By Dr. Diana Kirschner
“It” couple, Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom, are best friends who are madly in love and even launching their own reality TV series centered around their relationship. They got married after a mere one-month courtship and renewed their wedding vows at their first anniversary. How did they find committed love so quickly? It’s hard to say exactly what happened in their situation – true love always has its mysteries. But most probably there were certain factors at play – celebrity love secrets which you can use to create success in your own dating and love relationships. Here are a few of those secrets from my brand new book, Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love.
One critical secret involves using the three-question reality check about a hottie you may be dating:
1. Is he or she crazy about you? This is a big question, since you don’t want to pine after a person who is not into you!
2. Is this person willing to grow? There are no perfect partners out there, for sure. That said, if the person is gaga for you and willing to work on themselves, they could become an AMAZINGLY great partner!
3. Is he or she meeting the basics? In other words, is this a good person with integrity, who is successful, wants a relationship and shares some chemistry with you?
If your partner meets these criteria, give him or her a real chance. You could develop a crazy-in-love relationship that gets better and better… and lasts for 10, 20 or even 30 years!!
Another key secret: Look for consistently improving contact. When you meet a new hottie, the sparks are great and you are high as a kite. But the question is, how is the relationship changing over time?
Is there more closeness between you? Are you sharing more of your thoughts and feelings? Is the L word being used? Are you sharing each other’s space, meeting each other’s friends or family members? Are you beginning to talk about thoughts of a shared future together?
Really look at the trends in your relationship. Is it fading out? Is it getting boring? Are you starting to take each other for granted? Are you having longer or meaner fights?
Or is the trend improving over the months, or even years, just as it seems to be for Khloe and Lamar? There are always downticks in love, even in the beginning. But, if in the face of this, things bounce back, makeup sex happens and the intimacy is actually getting better, this is a very good sign. This means you could be with the One.
So, while it is very rare to have a one-month courtship that leads to lasting love, like Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom seem to have, it’s still possible to have a right-for-you courtship that works to create the love you really want. Bottom line: you can use these relationship secrets to get to your own happiest-ever-after!
Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. is a frequent guest psychologist on The Today Show & author of the new book, Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love which has been acclaimed by 14 top self-help gurus, including Dr. Christiane Northrup & John Gray. She authored the bestselling book, “Love in 90 Days,” which was the basis of a PBS Special on love. Get weekly support from Dr. Diana through her FREE Relationship and Dating Advice Newsletter.
