By Robert Manni
Question from Sarah Q. Detroit, MI: “I’ve been single for a while and I don’t know where to meet guys or how to put myself out there without going to a bar and waiting for someone to talk to me! How can I meet guys?”
Meeting guys when you just don’t know where to start!
Hi Sarah,
I understand your situation. These days being single can be daunting, especially for women. Unlike guys, although women are often the aggressors in relationships, most single women and relationship experts I’ve talked to agree that women prefer men to be men (in the best sense of the word) and make the first move. But it’s tough to hang around waiting for random guys to approach, and it’s not very empowering having to sift through guys who you are not be attracted to. That is unproductive and often unpleasant. So, what’s a single woman to do?
Related Link: Ask the Guy’s Guy: How to Win a First Date After Meeting Online
I suggest two modes of action. First, do whatever it is you enjoy doing. Never change that for anyone. But, at the same time you want to fish where the fish are. That means opening yourself up to new experiences and opportunities where guys hang out. Every dude is different, but most guys like some type of sports, art, action-packed activities, learning new stuff, and having a few beers with their buds.
If you like watching sports, find a wingman or woman and hit a sports bar. You might be into working out and/or playing sports. You’ll usually find guys running, playing water sports, skiing, golfing, or playing tennis, to name a few options. If you like arts and entertainment, consider attending a local film festival or night spot with live music. Or, take a class in martial arts, spinning, wine tasting, film, yoga, or learning a language. The key is getting yourself out there and doing things you like to do, while being open to new activities where guys congregate.
Related Link: Dating Advice Q&A: Is It Okay to Start a Relationship via Social Media
I’d reconsider online dating if you keep it low key. Why? Sure, we’ve all heard the horror stories, but we live in a digital culture, and a lot of couples have met online. It’s worth a shot. My wife took a three day trial on Match and we were engaged within a year. It’s all about being in the right place at the right time, and you can’t do that if you don’t try new things. Just don’t fall into the deep end of the online dating pool and end up overbooking yourself and forgetting why you went online in the first place. This happens a lot.
The key to meeting guys is doing what suits you and being in the same place as your target market. If you can find activities that meet both these criteria, you will be a happy camper, and happy campers often attract other happy campers. Finally, always love yourself, keep a positive attitude, and smile.
Hope this helps. Good luck,
Robert Manni
If you would like relationship expert Robert Manni to answer your online dating/relationship questions, please email gillian@nvmediainc.com
More about the Guy’s Guy:
Robert is the host of Guy’s Guy Radio, featured on Blog Talk Radio and available on iTunes, Stitcher, and TuneIn. The weekly podcast features interviews with relationship coaches, entertainers, authors, wellness experts, spiritual teachers, sports personalities, and a weekly “Guys’ Guy’s Guide” exploring current guy-focused topics.
His novel, THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE, praised as the “men’s successor to Sex and the City,” has been developed into two feature-length adapted screenplays, a scripted television series (pilot and treatment), and a series of non-scripted Guy’s Guy show concepts.
Robert has appeared on broadcast television (NBC’s Morning Blend, WPIX11 Morning News) and is a frequent guest across a spectrum of satellite, terrestrial, and web-based radio programs and podcasts, as well as a contributor to Huffington Post, Thought Catalog, Cupid’s Pulse, GalTime, is a featured expert on GoodMenProject and YourTango. He was also named a Top Dating Blogger by DatingAdvice.com.
Robert developed the Guy’s Guy Platform to help men and women better understand each other and bridge the growing communication gap between the sexes. He continually creates a fresh, robust palette of timely Guy’s Guy content focused on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Whether it’s navigating the challenges of dating, relationships, friendship, career or wellness, Robert explores ways to help both men and women be at their best so that everybody wins.
Read more at Cupid’s.
