In a surprising announcement, Hollywood proves that not everything is about award shows and after-parties.  Citing “irreconcilable differences,” Miley Cyrus’ father, Billy Ray Cyrus, filed for divorce from wife Tish after 17 years of marriage.  Like any couple that have contemplated and chosen divorce, they’ve attested, “As you can imagine, this is a very difficult time for our family.  We are trying to work though some personal matters.”  While they appreciate thoughts and prayers, the issue of custody has come up, and as Us Weekly states, “Billy Ray asks for shared custody of their three minor kids [Miley, Braison, and Noah], and for an equitable division of their marital assets.”

What are the most important factors to consider before deciding on divorce?


Cupid’s Advice:

When your relationship has hit a rough patch and it seems like there is no solution to your personal issues, should you consider a divorce?  When is divorce a topic to put on the table during a discussion with your partner?  Here are some factors to consider:

1. Hopeful or hopeless: DivorceMag.com says, “Hopelessness is the cancer in marriage.  People convince themselves that their problems are too huge to surmount and so they have to divorce.”  Before bringing up the idea of a divorce, make sure to ask yourself, “Is this something worth saving?”  Are you willing to put in the time and effort for counseling to save the union between you and your partner?

2. Threat or decision: Everyone gets angry sometimes. It can make it seem like times are tough.  Are you simply threatening a divorce to demand change from your partner, or are you confident that there’s nothing left for either of you to do to salvage your relationship?  Before you resort to a last ditch power play in an argument, think about why you are choosing that path.  Perhaps take some time apart so your decision comes from a grounded, reasonable place.

3. What does this mean for everyone?: When considering divorce, you will have to come to terms with the negative consequences this brings for you, your partner, and possibly, your children.  Are you ready to sit your children down and explain to them what has occurred and provide a support system for them during this time?Do you have a support system outside of your home?

Counseling or a trial separation are measures many couples take before deciding on divorce.  Give yourselves time to make sure this is the step you want to take.