By Michelle Rebecca
Have you stayed in a bad relationship way too long because you were afraid of being alone? Have you rebounded from a breakup too quickly because you missed having a partner? If so, your view of single life may be unrealistically negative. You don’t need a boyfriend to make you complete. In fact, being on your own can give you the chance to attend to your own needs and find your own strengths.
When you’re in a relationship, it’s easy to put your personal preferences on hold. For instance, you may have fallen into the habit of watching Sunday football as a way to spend time with your mate, even if you weren’t particularly fond of the sport itself. Or perhaps you let your ex choose the décor in the apartment you shared, or the music that you listened to at home. You may even have lost touch with friends who used to be important to you.
Now is a good time to take stock of your life and decide what you want out of it. If you have trouble reconnecting with your own dreams and desires, a few sessions of therapy or e-therapy may help you figure things out and set your life on the track that is best for you.
Examine Your Priorities
Relationships can be all-consuming. Ending a relationship that isn’t working can free up your time to focus on other priorities such as parenting, learning a new skill or advancing your career.
If you’re looking for life advice, New York celebrity Kristin Davis, former star of Sex and the City, is a good role model. Although she has recently teamed up with screenwriter Aaron Sorkin, she spent many years flying solo. In 2009, the actress told StarPulse that she had found fulfillment without a partner, and in 2011, she adopted a baby girl on her own.
Sandra Bullock is another actress who has prioritized her role as a mother. Single since a messy public divorce from Jesse James in 2010, Bullock has told the press that the most important man in her life is her adopted son.
Play the Field
Single doesn’t have to mean lonely. Just ask actress Octavia Spencer, who achieved much-deserved recognition – and an Oscar – for her role in The Help. Although not involved in a romantic relationship, Spencer rarely appears alone on the red carpet. She enjoys friendships and casual dating relationships with several men, each seemingly more handsome than the last, without feeling pressured to enter a long-term romance.
You, too, can use single time to befriend and/or date a variety of men. It might help to go out with someone who is nothing like your ex or with someone you might not have considered “dating material” before.
Being single doesn’t have to be a tragedy. In fact, it can be a huge opportunity to renew your relationship with the one person you can always count on – yourself.
Michelle is an aspiring writer with a passion for blogging. She enjoys writing about a vast variety of topics and loves that blogging gives her the opportunity to publically voice her thoughts and share advice with an unlimited audience.