The dating world is an endless competition. You’re constantly up against crowds of girls launching themselves at the same guys as you. But worst of all, you’re up against yourself.
Raye focuses on teaching you to have the relationship YOU want and gives some great tips on doing just that. Her leading piece of advice? “Actually fall in love with the way you are right now, even if you think you made mistakes.” Then, you will see that finding love is easy.
How can you stand out in a group of women?
According to Raye, there are four roads you can take in a relationship. Three of them are most commonly used, but they are the wrong ones.
What are these three wrong roads?
The Physical: This road refers to focusing too much on your body and sexuality. Getting too involved with what you look like makes you a sexual competitor, which means you are not viable for a relationship. As Raye explains, “Men are used to women being really provocative now,” and that makes it too easy for them to get what they want and dismiss any notion of a relationship. “It gets you the booty call” but prevents any type of romance from developing.
The Mental: The second road means discovering what you have in common.The common ground, says Raye, isn’t important except for the core values you share: honesty, being a good person, wanting a relationship. What you both like in the world, according to Raye, is irrelevant. Connecting with a man’s brain “creates a friendship, but he will not feel connected emotionally.”
The Energetic: Too many women make the mistake of finding a spiritual bypass — using the mantra that “you’re angry, but you’re above that”. Being a reasonable woman, making excuses and closing yourself off is only going to keep you cold and unable to express your true feelings, making dating miserable.
The fourth road is one that Raye says we’ve been told to avoid. However, it’s the right one.
The Emotional: If you key into your feelings and share them, you can show a man that you have the ability to be in touch with yourself emotionally. “The second he can feel your openness,” says Raye, “he’s going to open up” and fall in love with you.
Raye believes that if you open your heart and have a warm personality, a guy will make a beeline for you.