By Jemima Lopez
He lives in L.A, and he lives in London. Â While having a trans-Atlantic relationship is tough, if there’s anything British celebrity couple David and Victoria Beckham can prove is that long distance relationships can work. Â Married for 12 years, they just welcomed their fourth child. Â Their American counterparts, actors Brad Pitt and Angelia Jolie, have made it work, too. Â Despite separation between films, they’ve managed to stay in a committed relationship for seven years. Â They share six children.
But non-celebrities have remote relationships, too. Â In fact, more than 3.5 million Americans were in a long distance relationship in 2005, according to the latest statistics. Â With the development of new technology, that number is most likely on the rise. While us common folks can’t afford to jet set or send extravagant gifts, that doesnâ€™t mean our long distance relationship can’t last just as long. Â Use these tips to help maintain your relationship like the stars:
1. Use All Forms of Communication: Let’s get the obvious out of the wayâ€“physical interaction is scarce, so communication is key. Â Text messaging, instant messaging or even Facebooking is a start, but make your “communication” more interactive. Â Here are some examples:
-Â Date nights: “Skype Dates” are the normâ€“a designated time couples agree to video chat. Â But try to have a real date instead. Â Each week pick a movie and a meal to prepare or purchase. Â Arrange your laptop, screen facing you. Â Eat/engage in conversation like in a restaurant. Â Then, pop in the movie.Â This way, you can hear and see each other’s reactions to scenes. Â Bonus: movie-goers won’t tell you to pipe down.
-Â Send photos: Sending self-portraits are great, but always try to send photos of things that you find interesting or funny. Â It will allow your mate to get more in-tune with your personality and some insight into your world.
-Â Make videos: Hearing someone’s voice and seeing their face is more personable than a text. Â But people don’t always have time to videochat. Â Instead of sending a text, create a 30-second SMS video. Â Your significant other can view or respond when they have time, but it’s still special. Â There are apps that deliver “voice text messages,” like Voxer.
2. Get Addresses: This includes home and work address. Â Sending your mate a gift for no reason, like flowers, can keep a smile on your mate’s face. Â Remember that you can also treat your boo to lunch or dinner, because itâ€™s easy to get online and order a pizza that can be delivered to his or her front door. Â You can send traditional letters, too. Â There is something incredibly personable about seeing someone’s handwriting.
3. Schedule Monthly Meetings: You can talk for hours, but unless you see each other in the flesh at least once a month, your relationship will most likely fizzle. Â There are exceptions, like military relationships, which donâ€™t have the luxury. Â But for those that can travel at their own leisure, schedule monthly visits. Â Traveling back and forth can get expensive, so switch off.
4. Be Secure with the Relationship: Lastly, most remote relationships fail due to lack of trust. Â While understandable, if there is no trust, you shouldnâ€™t be together. Â Try not to let your jealousy get the best of you. Â That said, never completely ignore your intuition either. Â If something doesnâ€™t feel right, speak up.
Jemima Lopez is a freelance blogger and writer who writes for Zen College Life, the directory of higher education, distance learning, and best online schools. Â She welcomes your comments at her email: lopezjemima562@ gmail.com.