Last Friday, Jesse James allowed a long-awaited supervised meet-up between his 6-year-old daughter, Sunny James, with her mother, porn star Janine Lindemulder.  The reason for the long delay?  Up until the recent admission of infidelity by Jesse James, Lindemulder was considered to be the “bad” parent (Bitten and Bound). The former couple will be heading to court in two weeks to discuss more formal arrangements, provided Lindemulder has learned to put a filter on her conversations when near their little girl, as US Weekly reported.

Visitation is hard enough on kids these days. What can adults in this situation do to ensure equal, quality time?

Cupid’s Advice:

James and Lindemulder need to take their daughter into consideration when making plans to spend with their child.  In any visitation battle, it’s best to take the necessary time to plot out important events so that all parties involved are able to have a successful, yet separate, relationship.  Here are some ways to assist:

1. Make a list: Each adult needs to write out the special days they wish to share with their child(ren), whether it’s a holiday or a school play, then compare each list with each other and choose which days are the most important.

2. Compromise: Whenever there’s a conflict, you must be willing to concede when appropriate. You should always consider the child and their needs first. Talk it out and see if both of you can share a special day.

3. Talk with your child(ren): Once the two of you have come up with a plan of action and are in agreement, consider sitting down with your little ones (if they’re old enough to understand), and let them know what you’ve come up with. At this point, you can ask how they feel about the arrangements, or if they have any questions.

Families are the backbone of society. They support you when you venture out into the world, and they are there to comfort you when you stumble. If you’re part of a family living in separate houses, it doesn’t mean that it can’t work.