It was 10:00 p.m. when I dragged myself home and up the stairs of our SoCal suburban tract home. The kids were in bed, and I was ready to relax. From our bedroom, I heard my husband Jeffâ€™s voice on the phone raised in alarm. â€śCan you believe it? That is terrible!â€ť Adrenaline rushed through my body as my mind raced through the possible calamities that could have befallen him. As I walked into the bedroom, Jeff hung up the phone to greet me.
â€śWhatâ€™s the matter, Jeff?â€ť I cried.
â€śOh, nothing,â€ť he replied. â€śMy dad and I were just talking about the BachelorÂ episode tonight.â€ť
Related Link: ‘Bachelor’ Star AshLee Knew Sean Would Send Tierra Home
My husband, Jeff, is a Bachelor fan. Fanatic. We watch every episode, every season. At first, I protested, but now, I have been sucked into the reality show vortex from whence there is no return and am the one popping the popcorn. This seasonâ€™s bachelor, Sean Lowe, is one of my favorites. He seems like an honest guy trying everything he can to find his soul mateâ€“and how can you fault that?Â Unfortunately, the bachelors donâ€™t have a very good track record when it comes to choosing that special someone. So, now that weâ€™re down to the top three contestants, hereâ€™s what I would tell Sean if I were sitting in Chris Harrisonâ€™s seat.
#1. Choose the one that flies under the radar. While the drama queens (ahem, Tierra) might be more fun or interesting, theyâ€™re going to get on your nerves over time. So, Sean, if youâ€™re looking for a lifelong partner, choose the girl who is comfortable in her own skin and doesnâ€™t need to go out of her way to get attention.
#2. Choose the one who makes you laugh. Dating is full of desire and passion. But itâ€™s inevitable that, over time, physical attraction wanes. In a recent study commissioned by Medicis Aesthetics, it was found that physical attraction mattered more in the first seven years of a relationship than in later years. After that, predictors of long-term relationship satisfaction shifted more toward personality traits. So if you really do want a lasting relationship, choose the one you enjoy being with the most.
Related Link: 7 Ways to Build a Love That Lasts
#3. Choose the one who can put up with your pranks. Sean, we all know you as the bachelor who pulls pranks. You pranked Emily when you were a contestant on The Bachelorette, who didnâ€™t see the humor in it and kicked you off the show the same week. You also pranked the contestants this season, placing them in uncomfortable situations to test their ability to roll with the punches. Because this is apparently an enduring personality trait, you need to choose someone who can prank you back with equal zestâ€“or at least appreciate your sense of humor. Whether itâ€™s pranking, singing in the shower or biting fingernails, we all have idiosyncrasies that may be annoying to some. We just need to find partners who can love us for our uniqueness, not in spite of it.
Jeff and I will be watching what is sure to be â€śthe most dramatic rose ceremony in Bachelor historyâ€ť with popcorn in hand. And Iâ€™ll be interested to see whether Sean chooses the secure, confident, enjoyable woman that he needs to build a lasting relationship. If only I had Chris Harrisonâ€™s job…
Amy Osmond Cook, Ph.D. is a faculty associate at Arizona State University, where she teaches Communication and English classes. She is the publisher of Sourced Media Books and co-author ofÂ Hope After DivorceÂ andÂ Full Bloom: Cultivating Success. Amy and her husband, Jeff, have six children.Â For more information about Amy, please visitÂ amyosmondcook.com.